Loss
by NikkiB1973
Summary: With the death of her father, ten year old Bella Swan goes to live with the Black family...Set way before Twilight AU.
1. Chapter 1

**Loss**

Disclaimer: all characters and copyright belong to Stephanie Meyer.

**Prologue**

Billy was tinkering around with his truck when the call came. He heard his wife, Sarah call out his name. When he looked over at her, even the rare blinding sunshine couldn't hide the horror and grief etched on her beautiful face. He dropped the wrench he was holding and hurried over to her; his heart hammering at one hundred miles an hour. For her to look like that it had to be bad. He prayed in his head that it wasn't one of the children. It wasn't...

"He's gone, Billy. Shot in the line of duty." Sarah choked out, wet tears trailing down her soft cheeks.

For a moment he wondered who she could mean. Killed in the line of duty? Slowly the realization sank in. "Charlie...you're talking about Charlie?"

Sarah nodded, reaching out to him and clutching onto his arms. Her nails dug into his skin as she tried to compose herself. "They called here because we are named as Bella's guardians if anything happened to him."

Billy pulled his wife into his strong arms, holding her close, more for his comfort then hers. His mind went back to the day that his best friend since childhood had asked for him to look after his young baby if anything should happen to him. It was a legal requirement at work. Charlie's wife, Renee had died in childbirth, leaving Charlie to care for the infant alone.

"_I need you to sign some papers." Charlie had said._

"_Nothing's going to happen to you, Chief." He had replied nonchalantly. _

"_In my line of work..." Charlie had raised his eyebrows, rubbing the back of his neck in a nervous gesture. He always did that when he was worried. _

"_Come on." Billy recalled how blasé he had been about the whole thing. He had punched Charlie lightly on the shoulder. "The worst thing you ever face around here is traffic violations or the occasional teenage party that overruns." _

"_It only takes one bullet." Charlie had not smiled, his face was serious. "She has already lost one parent. I need to know she'll be cared for, Billy. Please?" _

_Billy's mirth had died. He said no more, just took the papers and signed them. After that they had shared a beer and never talked about it again._

"We have to go and collect her." Sarah's gentle voice pulled him out of his memories.

"Where is she?" Billy took a deep breath, trying to hold himself together.

"At school. A social worker is with her." Sarah patted his broad chest. "She must be petrified, Billy. You know how nervous she is."

Billy nodded. "Yeah, I know." He was still finding it hard to comprehend that this was really happening. Maybe it was some kind of bad dream. He closed his eyes briefly and pinched his elbow. He winced at the pain. No, this was real, all too real.

* * *

Bella sat curled up in a chair in the principal's office. A female social worker, who had introduced herself as Beth, sat beside her. On the other side sat her dad's deputy, Drake Peterson. He hadn't said much, just held his hat in his hands, twirling it round and round saying how sorry he was.

"When will daddy be back?" She asked, looking at Beth wide eyed.

Beth exchanged a glance with Drake. She let out a small sigh. It was common for people, especially young children, not to take in the news the first time they were told. It was like a self defense mechanism, deny that you knew and it couldn't possibly be true.

"I'm sorry, Bella. Your daddy isn't coming back I'm afraid. He was hurt while on duty bravely serving his country. He died, sweetheart." Beth said gently.

Bella looked at her disbelievingly. She shifted away from this stranger and turned to look at Drake. "When is daddy coming?" She asked him.

Drake hung his head, not being able to look the young girl in the eye. She was ten for god's sake. This shouldn't be happening. He shouldn't have to deal with this. He saw from the corner of his eyes that the young girl was looking at him pleadingly, mentally praying for him to deny Beth's words. "I'm sorry..." he muttered lamely. "He isn't coming back."

Bella sank back in her seat and curled up into a ball. They were wrong. These adults were liars. She didn't know why they were fibbing, but when she told her daddy, he would arrest them and put them away for upsetting her. Her daddy was protective, he would sort them out. She shot them both a fierce glare and then ignored them.

* * *

Billy pulled the truck up outside the small school and parked. He glanced at Sarah who was dabbing at her eyes. "Would you prefer me to go in alone?" He asked.

"No." Sarah shot him a dark look.

"Sorry I wasn't thinking." Billy felt like hitting his head on the steering wheel.

Sarah placed a hand on his arm. "It's okay. I'm the best one to speak to her. I've been through this myself. We go in together. The poor girl is probably in denial right now."

Billy took a deep breath and nodded. As Sarah climbed out of the truck, he discreetly wiped a tear from his eye. He could do his crying later in private. Right now he needed to be strong.

* * *

Sarah bit down on her lip as she looked at the petite, brown haired little girl sitting curled up in the big leather chair. There was an angry look in her chocolate brown eyes; it reminded Sarah of the same look she had worn when the police came to tell her that her parent's were dead. She dismissed this memory from her mind. She needed to focus. She approached Bella cautiously. When the little girl saw her, a small smile crossed her lips.

"Auntie Sarah..."

"Hey sweetie." Sarah knelt down in front of her.

"Auntie Sarah, they keep fibbing." Bella babbled straight away. "They keep saying that daddy isn't coming."

Beth opened her mouth to say something but Sarah held up her hand to stop her speaking. Instead she embraced Bella and picked her up easily. The child was feather light and easy to carry. "Come out for a walk, sweetie."

Bella nodded, clutching onto Sarah's shoulders and glaring at Beth and Drake as Sarah carried her out of the office. Billy remained behind and stood awkwardly in front of them. "Tell me what happened." He said bluntly.

Drake sighed and pushed his hat back on his head as he got up to face Billy. He knew that this man was Charlie's best friend. He had often seen them around together. "We're still investigating, but the bit that we have managed to cobble together is that the Chief went to answer a routine call. There was a minor disturbance at the local bar, just the usual shouting and stuff. The Chief went to break it up, not realizing that one of the men had a gun...he was shot once straight in the heart."

Billy's fists clenched by his sides. His eyes became moist as he tried to contain his anger. "Do you know who did it?"

Drake swallowed nervously. He hitched his trousers up and avoided Billy's eye. "We do, but the culprit slipped by us. We have units looking out for him now."

"Who was it?" Billy snapped.

"I cannot say right now as we are still..." Drake was taken aback when Billy suddenly lunged forward and gripped him by the lapels of his jacket.

"I said who was it?" He demanded, his dark eyes flashing fire.

"Sir please." Beth got up quickly and placed herself between them. "I understand that Chief Swan was your friend, but if you continue to act in this manner I will seriously have to consider whether you are the right person to care for Bella. You don't want her put in care, do you?"

Billy released Drake and stepped back. He sat down on on of the chairs and put his head in his hands. His shoulders began to shake as his emotions got the better of him. Charlie was dead, his best friend was gone and was never coming back.

Beth looked at him sadly. "Go and get his wife." She whispered to Drake.

Drake straightened his shirt and marched out of the office, his own eyes wet with tears.

* * *

Jacob threw his rucksack down on the ground and rummaged through the fridge for some food. He looked in disgust at the mouldy cheese and half eaten pizza that was all that was in there. It was shopping day; he wondered why his mom hadn't stocked up. He shut the fridge in annoyance and headed over to the bread bin. He pulled out a slice of bread and began munching it. School had been totally boring. The only excitement was when Quil had placed a frog in Miss Garrison's desk draw and it had leaped out when she had opened it, making the old woman scream. Quil had got a week's detention for that, but he had decided it was worth it. He was now a legend.

The sound of crying made Jacob pause; the bread halfway to his mouth. He edged around the corner of the kitchen and peered into the living room. He saw his mom cuddling Charlie's daughter, Bella. She was sobbing her heart out.

"What's going on?" He asked.

Sarah raised her head, there were tears shining on her own cheeks "Has school ended already?"

"Yeah." Jacob stood looking at the both awkwardly. "What's wrong?"

Bella raised her head and stared at him. Her pale face was pink and her eyes red rimmed from all the crying. "What's wrong?" She screamed at him. "My dad's dead that's what's wrong."

"Bella, sweetie." Sarah tried to pull her into another hug but she pushed her away.

"Leave me alone, all of you." Bella spat as she ran out of the living room and down the hall. They heard a door slam.

Jacob looked at his mom aghast. "Is this true?"

Sarah ran a hand through her long black hair agitatedly. "Yes."

"I'm sorry." Jacob muttered. "I didn't..."

"Hey, it's okay. Bella didn't mean anything by it. She's just scared." Sarah rushed to reassure him. "We all need to care for her now."

"I will." Jacob promised.

"That's my good boy." Sarah rose from her seat and cuddled her only son.

* * *

Bella lay curled up on the bathroom floor of the Black's house. She put her hands over her mouth to stop herself screaming. It wasn't true, her dad wasn't dead. This was all a bad dream. She closed her eyes tight and began to pray, begging god to give her daddy back. She had lost her mommy already. She didn't deserve to lose him too. She wasn't bad, was she?

* * *

Sarah and Billy were sitting at the kitchen table telling the twins about Charlie. Jacob could hear then asking questions. As usual Rebecca was being selfish and demanding, refusing to share her room with Bella. He heard Rachel telling her sister to be quiet. He didn't want to hear anymore. He headed down the hall to the bathroom, he knew that was where Bella had hidden herself. His mom had been about to go after her when the twins had come home from school.

Jacob hesitantly knocked on the bathroom door. "Bells?" He whispered. "Can I come in?"

"NO." Bella said fiercely. "Leave me alone."

"Please." Jacob skilfully unlocked the door, he had discovered how to do that a long time ago.

Bella sat up, her long hair falling about her face as she stared at him in shock. "How did you get in?"

"Magic." He said. "I'm sorry about Charlie."

Bella went pale again. "Is he really gone?"

Jacob walked over and sat down beside her. "I think so." He said gently.

Bella shivered as a cold feeling crept down her spine. "I'm cold." She mumbled.

Jacob didn't say anything. He put an arm over her thin shoulder and let her soak his shirt with her tears.

_**A/N-thanks for reading! **_


	2. Chapter 2

**Loss**

Disclaimer: all characters and copyright belong to Stephanie Meyer.

_**A/N-thank you for the kind reviews. Nikki :)**_

**Part One-All Alone**

Jacob woke up and stretched his aching muscles. He sat up and rubbed at his shoulders. Even though he had slept well, lying on the hard floor had made his limbs stiffen. He was going to have to find something soft to sleep on if this was going to become a permanent arrangement. He glanced over at his bed, Bella was still lying in it fast asleep. She had a restless night. He had woken on a few occasions when he had heard her crying softly.

Bella was meant to be sharing his sister's room, but with Rebecca's mean streak coming to the fore, she had found it impossible to sleep there. So, after his sister had been particularly harsh on Bella, she had fled to his room in the middle of the night. He had been alarmed to see Bella shaking and in floods of tears as she knocked on his door softly. Jacob had immediately given up his bed and slept on the floor. This had been going on for the last three nights. His parents knew nothing about it. They would make sure that Bella got up before his parents did and slip back into the twins room.

Jacob had confronted Rebecca about her lousy attitude but his sister had just sneered at him, yelling that the house was already overcrowded and why should they have to take in another _stray_ as she called Bella. This had made him angry and they had a shouting match which was only broken up by Billy. His dad had been furious, telling them off for arguing over petty things when Bella's father and his best friend had just died.

Rebecca had pulled her usual act, looking all innocent and wide eyed and blaming Jacob for starting the row. Billy had been too tired to see through her obvious lies, he was still in the midst of grieving. He just reprimanded Jacob and then left to sit down and close his eyes, trying to block out the fact that he would never get to see Charlie again. Rachel had hovered in the doorway of her room as she watched her brother and twin sister argue. She was afraid of Rebecca and never had the courage to stand up to her stronger twin. She felt sympathy for Bella but didn't dare take her side; she had been on the receiving end of her sister's tantrums enough in the past.

"Bells, you better get up." Jacob shook her gently.

Bella opened her tired eyes. She had been dreaming about her dad again. It was always the same one. He was standing in a field full of bright yellow flowers. Bella would smile at him happily, elated that she had found him at last. She would start to run toward him, but it was if her legs were rooted to the spot. She never reached him, and as she looked, he would just fade away into nothing.

"Is it already time?" She whispered sadly, hating the thought of going into the twin's room and facing Rebecca. The older girl was so much bigger built and intimidating.

"Yeah." Jacob helped her off of the bed. He gave her a brief hug. "It will be alright, Bells."

"I don't belong here, Jake." Bella sighed as she pulled on her dressing gown to keep out the chill. "Your sister hates me."

"Rebecca hates everyone." Jacob shrugged. "Don't let her get you down, and you do belong here."

Bella didn't reply. She took a deep breath and left his room, running quickly down the hall to the twin's room. She opened the door as quietly as she could, but it seemed Rebecca had been waiting for her. With her lips pressed together, Bella managed to hold in her cry of pain as Rebecca grabbed hold of her hair and yanked on it hard.

"Baby." Rebecca sneered. She pushed Bella away from her so that she fell on the floor. "Tell my parents and I'll make sure you are out on the streets."

"Rebecca stop it." Rachel whispered.

Rebecca glared at her sister. "Shut it, Rach."

Rachel gave Bella a sympathetic glance and then turned around, pulling the covers over her head. Bella crawled over to the camp bed that had been set up for her to use. She climbed on it and copied Rachel, pulling the covers over her head so that Rebecca couldn't see her crying.

* * *

Sarah made breakfast for everyone. Her eyes were sore from crying. Today was Charlie's funeral. She sighed as she wondered how poor Bella was going to cope. Memories of attending her own parents funerals were fresh in her mind. She set the table and called out for the children to get up. The twin's were the first to arrive. Rachel sat down first and reached for the milk.

"Thanks mom." She said politely.

Sarah touched the back of her head, stroking her hair. "That's okay, sweetie."

Rebecca gave her sister a sour look. "Suck up." She muttered.

"I heard that." Sarah chided her daughter.

Rebecca schooled her features into a bland expression. "Sorry." She mumbled.

"Right." Sarah knew her daughter didn't mean it. Relations between her and Rebecca were frosty at best. Sometimes she wondered where she had gone wrong with her. Rebecca had a jealous streak a mile wide.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the arrival of Jacob and Bella. As usual Charlie's daughter was hiding behind her son. She seemed to have become attached to him. It was Jacob who had been the one who managed to keep Bella calm throughout the last few chaotic days. They had to go and collect her things from Charlie's house. It had been heartbreaking to see the young girl clinging to one of his shirts and crying. Jacob had sat by her side, comforting her while Sarah and Billy went about gathering her things together.

The house would have to be sold at some point, then there were all the insurance documents and forms to be filled in. The thought of it gave Sarah a headache. She dismissed it all from her mind and forced a smile onto her face. "Morning you two, sit down." She gestured at the empty chairs.

Jacob pulled one out for Bella and she smiled at him gratefully as she sat down. Rebecca shot her a dark look, but refrained from saying anything as her mother was nearby. Bella took a slice of toast and nibbled on the end, her appetite was non-existent. Jacob on the other hand piled his plate high with food and began to munch his way through it.

"You are such a greedy pig." Rebecca hissed at him.

Jacob poked his tongue out at her and just continued eating. Rebecca frowned, shoving her plate away and getting up from the table. "I'm going to shower."

"Okay." Sarah said distractedly.

The atmosphere improved considerably when Rebecca had left. Rachel's shoulders relaxed and she smiled kindly at Bella, offering her some more toast. "I'm sorry about my sister." She whispered to her.

"Thank you." Bella whispered back, touched by her gesture. It was hard to believe that Rachel and Rebecca were twins, they were both polar opposites in personality.

Billy came in from outside, he had been cleaning the truck down and getting a few things ready. Harry and his family would be traveling with them to the funeral, although Sue couldn't attend because she thought Seth was too young. So it would be just Harry and his daughter, Leah. Sarah glanced up at her husband. "Are you alright?"

He nodded quickly, flashing his children and Bella a tired smile. "Yeah, I've cleaned up the truck. I'll just hop in the shower."

"Rebecca's in there." Sarah warned him.

Billy sighed. Instead he pulled up a chair and joined the others at the breakfast table. Jacob passed his dad some food. "Thanks son."

Jacob smiled at him before shifting his chair closer to Bella. Billy watched the two of them interact, like Sarah, he could see how close they were already. His son had a kind and caring nature, it was in him to look after and nurture things. He was grateful that Bella had someone close to her age to watch over her when he and his wife couldn't. He had thought maybe his daughters would have taken on that role, but he sensed a bit of tension there, especially from Rebecca. Billy buttered some toast and ran down the list in his head what he needed to take with him, it seemed endless. It was going to be a long day indeed as he said goodbye to his best friend for the last time.

* * *

It rained, of course it had to rain. It pelted down, soaking through the mourners clothes as they stood at the graveside. The church had been packed, with some people having to stand outside. Charlie Swan had been a popular man and everyone in the community and beyond were devastated by his untimely death. Poor Bella stood pressed into Jacob's side as one by one, strangers and people she barely knew came to say a few words to her. Jacob made it his duty to hold her hand and stand in front of her a little, as if protecting her from harm.

Billy and Sarah were busy deflecting questions about what had happened to Charlie and how his daughter was coping. Some of the mourners were downright nosy and it had been hard for both of them to keep their anger in check. It was obvious the rumour mill had gone into overdrive and the salacious gossip had already begun.

A select number of people returned to the Swan house for refreshments. Sarah was busy in the kitchen handling the food and keeping the more intrusive guests away from poor Bella. Harry and Billy toured the room, doing the same thing. It was left to Jacob and Leah to keep an eye on Bella.

Leah was not known for her empathetic nature; she was very much a tomboy, finding most girls weak and boring. She looked down on Rebecca and Rachel, who were too girly for her taste. She would have thought the same of Bella, but felt sorry for the girl as she watched her cling to Jacob like a life raft. Seeing something so broken and helpless touched her and she found herself drifting over to the petite brunette.

"I'm sorry about your dad. I liked him, he knew how to fish." Leah said in her blunt way.

Bella blinked a couple of times and looked at her with haunted eyes. "Thank you." She whispered. She had seen Leah around a lot but had never approached Harry's daughter before or really spoken to her. She found the older girl intimidating.

"You have to be strong you know." Leah whispered to her fiercely. "Rebecca's a bitch and Rachel's weak. Jake won't be able to be with you all the time. You need to toughen up. I can help you if you want."

Bella looked anxiously over at Jacob who was just coming back with some plates piled high with food. He weaved his way through the crowds easily. "Why won't he be with me?"

Leah took her by the shoulders and studied her intently. "He's a boy, Bella. I'm not saying he won't be there for you, but he is younger and has friends of his own. You need to learn to stand on your own two feet. Like I said I can help you."

A sick feeling coursed through Bella, she felt like she was going to faint. Leah was right, Jake would get sick of her hanging around him all the time. She was on her own now, with no parents or anyone who loved her anymore. She needed to be able to cope alone. She swallowed down the lump in her throat and looked at the older girl pleadingly. "Tell me how." She begged.

"Come over to mine tomorrow and I'll show you." Leah smiled at her before releasing her shoulders.

Jacob finally reached them. He looked at them both curiously as he handed Bella one of the plates. "What's going on? You're not upsetting her Lee are you?"

"No." Leah snapped. "That's Rebecca's role isn't it? I heard your cow of a sister picking on Rachel earlier. Why don't your parents reign her in?"

"My parents have a lot to deal with right now." Jacob retorted.

Leah's face softened as she realized she had overstepped the mark. "Sorry." She apologized. "Just keep an eye on this one, she's frail and just ripe for Rebecca to rip to pieces."

"Believe me I know." Jacob said earnestly. He turned to look at Bella who was standing there, holding the plate of food limply in her hand. She looked terrified. He put a comforting arm around her. "Don't worry, Bells. I'm here."

Bella gave him a weak smile. He was such a kind boy, but there was only so much he could do. She was a burden his family could do without, she knew that. It would only be a matter of time before the Black's got tired of looking after her and placed her in some kind of foster home. She needed to toughen up, just like Leah had said.

"Can I come over early tomorrow?" She asked Leah softly.

Leah gave her an encouraging smile. "Of course. I better get back to my dad before he eats the wrong things. My mom has been nagging him about his cholesterol." She rolled her eyes and disappeared back into the crowd.

"Why would you go over to Leah's?" Jacob asked her.

Bella put her plate of food down without eating it. "She just invited me." She replied, shrugging her shoulders.

"Do you want me to come with you?" Jacob asked as he cleared his plate of food.

"No, it's okay." Bella wished that he would come, but she had to make a start somewhere. Today was the day that she truly realized she was an orphan and alone in the world.

_**A/N-thanks for reading!**_


	3. Chapter 3

**Loss**

Disclaimer: all characters and copyright belong to Stephanie Meyer.

_**A/N-thank you for the lovely reviews. Be warned the title of this story says it all. Nikki :(**_

**Part Two**

_Two years later;_

Bella bent over, resting her hands on her knees as she tried to regain her breath. Leah came running back over to her. "Come on Swan, you can't give up now. We still have another mile to complete. Coach said we need to keep training if we want to compete with the best."

"I know that." Bella gasped out, glaring up at her friend. "I'm not as fit as you."

"That's bullshit." Leah pulled Bella so she was standing up straight again. "You're just having a bad week. Come on."

Bella groaned as Leah took off again, already disappearing into the distance. She took another deep breath and wiped her brow before following after her. It had been two years since the Black's had taken her in as one of their own. At first the transition had been difficult. Their daughter, Rebecca, had been adamant that she didn't want another interloper joining the family. She had made Bella's life hell until Leah had taken her under her wing and showed her how to defend herself. It had been a hard lesson to learn but a necessary one.

Rebecca was a bully, plain and simple. She even dominated her twin sister Rachel to such a degree that the poor girl was a nervous wreck. Billy and Sarah were unaware of the extent of Rebecca's bullying, she had an uncanny knack of turning the tables on others, making it seem as if it was them to blame. She saw Bella as another easy target, that was until Leah showed her a few moves that put the older girl in her place.

It wasn't long after the funeral that Rebecca stepped up her hate campaign against Bella. She would use any opportunity to harass and upset the ten year old. Scaring her with tales about being abandoned and put into a children's home if she ever told her parents. Bella's main defender had been Jacob, without him she would probably have run away during those first few weeks, but he managed to deflect the worst of his sister's tactics, often getting in trouble himself because of it. However Leah's words at her dad's funeral had penetrated Bella's psyche and she knew that the older girl was right. She needed to toughen up and fast. So over a period of weeks her new friend had taught her just that. The satisfaction Bella had derived the first time she had fought back against Rebecca and won had been empowering.

It wasn't long before Rebecca called a stalemate. She couldn't cope with the fact that she failed to win against the newcomer. It shocked her to see just how many defenders she had within the family and outside of it. Even the normally tough Leah Clearwater had become one of her friends. Rebecca was a coward inside. She got pleasure out of hurting others, but when the tables were turned she couldn't handle it. So after Bella began to show that she wasn't scared of her threats and learned to defend herself, Rebecca began to backtrack. The two girls agreed to keep out of each others way as much as possible, difficult as it was as they lived under the same roof.

Bella never shared the twin's room again. Billy and Sarah were totally unaware that she spent each night in Jacob's room instead. Bella would sleep in his bed while he camped out on the floor. She would set her alarm for six and make sure she was up and about before the adults. So far she hadn't been caught out and the twin's never said anything. The arrangement was working so far.

* * *

Sarah was washing up the breakfast dishes when Bella came in from her run. The young girl's pale complexion was flushed and she looked ready to pass out. "Do you need some water, sweetie?"

Bella smiled wanly. "Thanks."

"Lee been pushing the boundaries again?" Sarah raised her eyebrows questioningly.

Bella nodded. "She forgets we're not all natural athletes like she is. I have to work twice as hard as she does to get the same results."

Sarah handed her the water. "You should be proud of what you've achieved Bella. I know your dad would be."

This praise made Bella smile. She chugged down the water and passed the glass back to Sarah. "Where is everyone?"

"Jake's in the garage. Rebecca's still getting ready and Rachel left for school already." Sarah frowned. "Has she got a boyfriend or something? I have never known Rachel to be so eager to get into school."

Bella's face reddened even further giving the whole game away. Sarah laughed. "Don't worry I won't tell her you inadvertently let her secret out. Just tell me this, is he a good boy?"

"Yes, you have no worries there." Bella said with relief.

"I don't suppose you could tell me who it is." Sarah asked.

Bella shook her head. "Sorry, Rach would not be happy. I know that she will be telling you soon."

"Alright." Sarah sighed. "You better get in the shower and get ready for school."

"Okay, thanks Sarah." Bella gave her a quick hug and disappeared down the hall toward the bathroom.

Sarah looked after her fondly and went back to the washing up.

* * *

Jacob was waiting for Bella when she finally emerged from the bathroom. Her hair was still wet so she had piled it on her head in a messy bun. She smiled as he handed her a slice of toast. "Thanks."

"You're welcome. I just about nabbed it before Queen Bitch was about to shove it down her throat." Jacob laughed as Rebecca glared at him.

"Mom will kill you if she hears you saying that." She hissed.

"Go crawl back under your rock, sis." Jacob retorted. He grabbed Bella's hand and pulled her toward the front door, grabbing both their bags with his free hand as he passed.

* * *

"So, how is the latest project coming along? Sarah said you were in the garage early this morning." Bella asked with interest as they walked to school together.

Jacob grinned. "Awesome. The car is all in pieces at the moment, but dad reckons he can source some parts from the wrecker's yard."

Bella giggled. "Only you could get excited about an old rusty heap of junk."

Jacob put his arm over her shoulders and pulled her close, ruffling her hair as he did so. "That rusty old heap of junk will get me from A to B when I'm old enough to drive."

"You drive already." Bella pushed him away and straightened her hair. "You better watch the police don't catch you. You are only ten, Jake."

"I only drive around the res. Dad hasn't got a problem with it." Jacob said easily. "You worry too much."

Bella rolled her eyes at his blasé attitude. They continued to walk together, chatting easily. As they got closer to the school, others joined them. Leah called out to Bella and she left Jacob's side to go join her. He frowned in annoyance, Clearwater was always interrupting his time with Bella. Before he got into too much of a strop he was bombarded from behind. Quil leapt on his back, nearly sending him crashing to the floor.

"Get off you idiot." Jacob complained as he shook his friend off and picked up his bag.

"What's bitten you this morning, dude?" Quil laughed loudly as Jacob punched him in the shoulder.

"Leah Clearwater." Jacob muttered.

Quil's eyes traveled over to Bella and Leah, who had their heads bent close together, whispering to each other. "Oh I see, Lee got in between you and that hot stepsister of yours."

"Eyes off." Jacob cuffed Quil on the back of the head.

"What's Quil done now?" Embry came up behind them, his rucksack dragging behind him in the dirt.

"The usual." Jacob said easily. "You're running late again."

"Mom was suffering with her usual hangover. I had to help her get ready, made me late." Embry replied quietly.

Jacob and Quil exchanged a glance. It was well known what a crap home life their friend had. They didn't press the matter further, instead they began to share their usual banter as they followed the other kids into the school.

* * *

Sarah looked at the shopping list she had compiled. It wad getting longer every week and every week there was less and less money to pay for it. Billy had been laid off from work not too long ago. His diabetes was taking it's toll on his body and he was no longer able to push himself like he used to. He had managed to get a part time job, which was not as strenuous, but it didn't bring in enough money to feed the large family. Sarah herself worked two jobs. She did a night shift at the local gas station, came home for a few hours rest and then headed off again to work in Old Quil's convenience store.

She looked at her watch, she was late again. Old Quil could be a hard person to work for. The older he got, the grouchier he became. Sarah didn't relish getting a lecture about time keeping from the old fool. Shoving the list in her bag she grabbed the keys to the truck and left the house, locking up behind her.

The truck was idling badly when she started it. Sarah had meant to mention it to her husband the night before but he had been so melancholy, worrying about the state of their finances that she hadn't the heart to tell him they may need to scrape some more of their meager funds into fixing the truck. She prayed in her head for it to keep going as she pulled out of the drive and headed for work. She made a mental note to herself that she had to head into Forks after work to pick up some extra food, Old Quil's store didn't stock everything that she needed. Billy was on a special diet, another extra expense they could do without. Feeling pressured, Sarah gritted her teeth and concentrated on the road ahead.

* * *

Sarah's day went from bad to worse. She had been feeling so tired from her night shift that she had unexpectedly fallen asleep at the till when the store was quiet. Old Quil had come shuffling out and caught her with her head resting on the counter.

"I don't pay you to nap during work. What if a customer had been in here? Or one of those youngsters who find it fun to shoplift?" He snapped at her.

Sarah had jolted awake, her hair swinging in her face as she looked at the old man. "I'm sorry, Quil. I have had a long night. It won't happen again."

"See that it doesn't. I gave you this job against my better judgement. Don't let me regret it." Old Quil pointed his bony finger at her before shuffling back to his post out the back.

Sarah made a face behind his back. Moments later she was fast asleep again.

* * *

It was raining when Sarah left the store. She groaned as she felt the wet drops soak through her clothes. She felt exhausted. Keeping her eyes open at work had been a strain. She climbed slowly into the truck and switched on the engine. Nothing!

"No. Not now." Sarah hit the steering wheel in frustration. Tears began to leak out of her eyes as exhaustion and worry consumed her. She kept turning the engine over and over until it finally sparked into life. Breathing a sigh of relief she pulled away and headed for Forks.

* * *

The rain was pelting down and visibility was down to zero. Sarah strained her tired eyes as she stared at the road ahead. The windscreen wipers made no impact on the streaming water and she cursed under her breath. This was turning into one hellish day. The drive to Forks seemed to take forever and she began to regret even attempting it in this weather. The truck's engine was making an alarming noise and she knew that she had probably caused more damage to it by forcing it.

As she neared the outskirts of Forks the engine made a loud whining noise and the whole truck shuddered. "What the hell?" Sarah looked down at the speedometer briefly, taking her eyes off the road.

That was to be her fatal mistake. Once her eyes returned to the road ahead, she saw through the streaming rain a young mother and her daughter attempting to cross the road. Both of them had their hoods pulled over their heads against the driving rain and seemed oblivious to her approach. Sarah slammed on the brakes, her eyes riveted to the young mother as she turned her head and finally realized what was heading her way. She picked up her daughter and ran, but not quick enough. Sarah had no choice but to spin the wheel, taking the truck on a treacherous path. With the road slick with water and the truck shuddering as if it would split apart, it skidded across the road and straight into the thick bole of a tree. Sarah's head smashed against the steering wheel on impact, then her body jolted back in her seat, wrenching her body sideways. The truck came to a squealing halt.

At the age of thirty four Sarah Black was dead.

_**A/N-sob! :'(**_


	4. Chapter 4

**Loss**

Disclaimer: all characters and copyright belong to Stephanie Meyer.

_**A/N-thank you for the lovely reviews. I really appreciate it. Nikki :)**_

**Part Three-Desperation**

_Four years later;_

"So how have you been, Bella?" Beth asked gently.

Bella sighed as she looked at her social worker. Beth came to visit her every six months to check up on her welfare and have a little _chat_, as she termed it. Bella felt like it was more of an interrogation to find out how the family were all coping now that they were headed by a single parent, and a disabled one at that. Billy's diabetes had gotten the better of him over the years, without his wife to monitor him he had been neglecting his health considerably. A year after Sarah's death he was wheelchair bound.

"I've been fine." Bella replied irritably.

"Are you sure?" Beth scrutinized her closely. "It must be hard living with a disabled person."

Bella shot her a dark look. "I said I'm fine. We are all fine. Can I go now?"

Beth pursed her lips and typed some notes on her laptop before gathering her things together. Before she left the house, she turned back to Bella. "One word of advice, Bella. You are sixteen now and a young woman. Soon you will no longer be under the care of the social services. If you are experiencing any problems then I suggest you ask for help now before it's too late for us to place you in a more suitable environment."

"This is my home." Bella snapped. "This is the most suitable environment."

"I see." Beth said coldly. "Good day to you."

"Bye." Bella watched the older woman go and breathed a sigh of relief when she heard the engine start outside. The coast was clear.

"Is she gone?" Jacob emerged from the hallway where he had been listening in to the conversation.

"Yeah, don't worry." Bella sat down on the couch and ran a hand through her hair, smoothing out the static strands. "Is he awake yet?"

"No." Jacob said bitterly as he came and joined her. "It may take a while for him to sleep this latest drinking binge off."

"How did he even get hold of the alcohol?" Bella asked exasperatedly. "I checked before I left for school and there was nothing anywhere."

"Kay I guess. You know that Embry's mom has been spending time here during the day while we're at school." Jacob closed his eyes for a moment, feeling the weight of the world on his shoulders.

"Have you heard from Rebecca or Rachel?" Bella asked him suddenly. The twins were now twenty and had fled the nest leaving them both to care for Billy alone. Rachel was at college, she had acquired a scholarship which thankfully paid the fees and living expenses. Rebecca had left when she was sixteen, running away to Hawaii and marrying a surfer after only knowing him for a week.

"As if." Jacob muttered. "They both couldn't wait to get away, not that they were much use when they were here."

Bella sighed again, feeling hopeless. She wondered just how long they could continue on like this. No one really knew how bad the situation was for them. Billy's disability cheque hardly covered day to day living expenses. His medication was extortionate and there was little left over for food. The loss of his wife and soul mate had hit him hard, he deteriorated rapidly after Sarah's death, finding solace in drink which was the main reason his health had declined so fast. Jacob and Bella regularly had to scour the house to clear away any alcohol that he managed to lay his hands on. Unfortunately for them he had become friendly with Embry's mom, Kay, who was an alcoholic herself.

"You know the cupboards are bare, Jake." Bella confessed. "I sold the last of my stuff the other day. I haven't got anything left that's worth anything. I still have another two years before my trust fund kicks in." She hated the fact that she had money in a fund building up interest but couldn't access it. The proceeds from Charlie's life insurance and the sale of his house had been poured into it for her future.

Jacob turned his head to look at her. He reached out and took her hand in his own. "You're only staying here because of me. If the social worker knew how bad it was, you could be placed somewhere better."

Bella shook her head vehemently. "That's not true. I stay because this is my home."

Jacob smiled at her, releasing her hand so he could put his arm over her shoulders. He could feel how tense she was. "Listen, I'll take dad's fishing gear and go out and see if I can catch anything for dinner tonight."

"Okay." Bella rested her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes. She wondered just how long they could continue like this before it all fell apart around them.

* * *

"Here take this." Leah shoved the wad of cash into Bella's hands.

Bella stared at it in shock, there had to be at least a hundred dollars. "Where did you get this?"

Leah shrugged nonchalantly. "Sold my I-Pod."

"But you love that I-Pod, it was a gift from your parents for your eighteenth. I know how much you love listening to it when you run." Bella replied, guilt weighing heavy on her heart.

Leah frowned as she put her hands on Bella's shoulders. "It means nothing, don't worry. I know you and Jake are struggling. You won't let me tell my parents how bad it is, so at least let me do this for you. I can see how much weight you've lost. Use it for food or whatever."

Bella felt tears prick at her eyes, she was touched by Leah's gesture but it proved just what dire straights she and Jacob were in. "Thank you." She whispered.

Leah could see her friend was on the verge of tears. She reached out and pulled her into a hug. "I'd do anything for you, Bella. You only need to ask."

"You do enough already." Bella said gratefully as she returned her hug. "I don't know what I would do without you."

Leah sighed as she released her. "How much longer do you really think you can carry on like this though, Bella?"

"I don't know. I was hoping we could eke it out until I can access my trust fund."

"That's two years away." Leah shook her head in disbelief. "You won't survive that long."

Bella's expression darkened. "Oh we will. I'll make sure of it." She retorted fiercely.

Leah gave her friend a small smile. "Only you would think that."

Bella glanced down at the money in her hands. "I have to think that, Lee. If I let myself give into despair then it will all come crashing down around me. I can't let Jake and Billy down."

"It's Billy who has let you down." Leah said gently. "You can't take this all on yourself."

"I have to." Bella replied desperately. "Who else is there?"

* * *

Billy eagerly took the beer can from Kay's hand and popped it open. The cool liquid slid easily down his throat and he grinned in satisfaction. "Now I have been thirsting for this all day."

Kay smiled at him as she placed the brown paper bag filled with cans at his feet. "I thought you might."

They both sat on the porch looking out at the scenery. It was a rare sunny day, Jacob and Bella were at school, and it gave Billy the opportunity to relax without them nagging him constantly. Kay glanced sideways at him as she filled her own glass with vodka. "I need more money, Billy. That was the last of it."

Billy finished his beer and crushed the can in his hand. "I gave you money two days ago."

"This stuff is expensive." Kay whined. "If you want more, then I need some more money."

"I haven't got any." Billy muttered angrily, his hands shaking. The urge to drink was all consuming and he began to feel ill at the prospect of days being forced to stay sober, with thoughts of his dead wife whirling around his head and keeping him awake at night.

"No money, no drink." Kay stated matter of factly.

"I'll find some. Wait here." Billy growled. He spun his chair around and went back into the house. He knew that Jake and Bella must have some money, he just needed to know where they hid it. His self worth had long ago disappeared as he sunk lower into alcohol dependency. All that mattered was his next fix. He first checked Jacob's room, rooting through his drawers and the pockets of his clothes. He came up empty. His whole body began to tremble in his desperation. He left Jacob's room and went into the twin's old room, which was occupied by Bella. He did the same in there, going through her things. He opened up her old jewellery box and his eyes widened as he saw the rolled up dollar bills placed inside. His face lit up with a smile.

Kay was stunned when Billy reappeared and chucked the money in her lap. "Will that be enough?" He asked her drily.

Kay counted out the money. "More then enough." She smiled at him and hit her glass against his can. "Cheers."

Billy felt a smidgeon of guilt about what he had done, but it was soon drowned out as the alcohol flooded his system. By the time Bella and Jacob came home they found him passed out in his chair, completely inebriated.

* * *

Jacob was alarmed when he heard Bella scream. He left his dad's room, he had been cleaning his father up and making him comfortable. He fled to the twin's old room, he found Bella standing over her jewellery box, staring at in disbelief.

"What's wrong?"

Bella held the empty box out to him. "It's gone."

"Gone?" Jacob didn't know what she was talking about.

"The money I hid in here. Lee sold her I-Pod and gave me one hundred dollars. He's taken it." Bella said in despair. "I can't believe it. That money was for food and he must have given it to Kay for booze."

"Lee gave you money?" Jacob felt sick inside. His dad had definitely sunk to new lows. He went over to hug Bella but she pushed him away. "Bells?"

"I've had enough." She spat.

"What?" Jacob took hold of her shoulders. "What do you mean?"

"What I said. This is the last straw." Bella pushed him away again and ran from the room.

"Bells, please..." Jacob called after her, his heart was racing at a hundred miles an hour. He sprinted after her. She was in his dad's room.

"You took it you selfish man." Bella raged at Billy.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Billy mumbled. His head was banging and her loud voice was making it ache. "Get out."

"Oh I plan to. I am so done here." Bella spun on her heel and marched out of the room.

Jacob caught her as she was just about to go back into the twin's old room. "Bells, don't please."

"I can't do this, Jake. It has to stop. I need to get out." Bella's anger knew no bounds. "I have tried to help him but he is beyond saving."

"You can't go." Jacob pleaded with her. "I need you."

Bella stood in the hall, her eyes riveted to his as she saw the desperation shining from his. His short hair was sticking up in spikes where he had been running his hand through it agitatedly. She was the one who cut it after Sarah died. He only kept it long because his mother had liked it. They had thrown the silky strands into the grave before the gravediggers had begun to throw earth on top of her coffin. The memory made her pause. "I hate him right now." She whispered.

Jacob's chest was heaving with each breath that he took. "So do I...but he's my dad."

"Oh Jake." Bella couldn't take the look on his face. She would never have left really, she was just venting. She felt his arms wrap around her and his lips press into her hair as he clutched onto her for dear life. She had done the same to him when her father had died.

"Don't leave me. You're the only good thing in my world." Jacob whispered. "I love you."

Bella felt the tears begin to slide down her cheeks as she hugged him back.

_**A/N-thanks for reading!**_


	5. Chapter 5

**Loss**

Disclaimer: all characters and copyright belong to Stephanie Meyer.

_**A/N-thanks for the awesome reviews. Nikki :)**_

**Part Four-Intervention**

Bella opened her eyes and blinked as the light shining through the thin curtains blinded her. She felt warm, very warm and kind of squashed. She turned her head around at an awkward angle and glanced behind her. Jacob was still fast asleep; his cheek was resting on her back where he was spooned behind her, and his limbs were wrapped around her holding her close. Bella sighed as she began to extricate herself from his hold. They had retreated to his room the night before and lay opposite each other on his bed, talking and trying to come up with some kind of plan to make Billy wake up to what he was doing. One thing was certain, they had to make sure that his accomplice, Kay, was banned from the house. They had fallen asleep in the midst of talking, worn out by the days events.

"Ten more minutes." Jacob mumbled as he pulled Bella back against his chest.

"Jake, we need to get up." Bella elbowed him and struggled to rise.

Even though he was only fourteen, Jacob was strong, he had recently had a growth spurt and now stood just shy of six feet tall. He dwarfed Bella and she was no match for his strength. He wrapped his arms back around her and rested his head on her back again, falling asleep instantly. Bella sighed again, giving up. She lay her head back on the pillow and closed her eyes. Ten more minutes wouldn't hurt.

* * *

The next time she opened her eyes, the sun was shining further down the bed. She frowned as she raised her head and looked blearily around her. Jacob shifted behind her, trying to make himself comfortable again. She caught sight of the clock and gasped. It was gone eleven in the morning, they had missed school.

"Jake, wake up." She demanded.

"What?" He complained, finally opening his eyes and releasing his stranglehold on her.

"It's eleven in the morning." Bella slipped off of the bed and smoothed her clothes down. Her shirt was wrinkled. She hadn't even got undressed the night before. "I can't believe this. The last thing we need is the school getting involved because we haven't turned up."

Jacob rolled off the bed and onto his feet. Running a hand through his messy bed hair, he yawned and stretched. His arms nearly reached the ceiling. "Stop stressing, Bells. It's only one day. When was the last time we ditched school? Anyway we both needed the rest. That was the best night's sleep I've had in ages."

"Yeah, me too." Bella conceded, finally calming down. "We better check on your dad."

Jacob's expression darkened. "Or we could leave him to stink in his own pit."

"Jake." Bella said warningly. "He needs his meds."

"I'm on it." Jacob paused for a second before leaving. A faint blush touched his cheeks as he looked at Bella awkwardly. "What I said last night, I meant it, Bells."

Bella froze, dropping her eyes to the floor as she fiddled with the hem of her shirt nervously. "Jake...don't."

"Why?" He turned to face her, putting his hands on her shoulders and standing in front of her.

"Because..." Bella shrugged, still keeping her eyes on the floor. "Go and see to your dad."

Jacob released her shoulders and touched her hair instead, leaning down so he could press his lips to her forehead. "I love you." He said quickly, before running from the room.

Bella stared after him, her fingers touching the spot where his lips had connected with her skin.

* * *

Seeing to Billy was not easy. He was a big built man despite his illness and it was hard moving him from his bed when he refused to co-operate. Jacob's muscles bunched under his shirt as he raised his dad upright. Bella brought the wheelchair over and she took hold of Billy's legs as they slid him into it.

"I told you to leave me alone." Billy growled, angry that they had woken him.

"You reek." Bella stated bluntly." You need a wash."

"What I need is a drink." Billy yelled at her.

"Shut up old man." Jacob said fiercely. "Don't you ever talk to her that way."

Billy was stunned by his son's words. He looked at Jacob like he had never seen him before. Just then he had sounded like a man, no longer the young boy he was used to. His eyes traveled up his son's tall body, taking in the unusual height, the muscles that were already beginning to show, even underneath his shirt. His eyes finally rested on Jacob's face, there was nothing left of the sunny boy he remembered. He looked older then his years. If Billy didn't know him he would have put him at least twenty years old and not fourteen. For the first time in an age, a niggling worry creased his brow. Was he missing something here? He remained silent as Jacob pushed his chair into the small bathroom. He watched as his son filled up the bath and got his things ready.

"I don't want you fighting me, dad. Just let's get this over with." Jacob said sternly.

Billy just nodded, his mind still whirling, the alcoholic fog making his brain feel slower than normal. Jacob took this as a sign of consent. With his muscles taking the strain, Jacob lifted his father out of his chair and lowered him carefully into the bath.

* * *

Bella pulled out what was left in the cupboards. It wasn't much. She did the best she could, whipping up some toast and a few slices of bacon. By the time Jacob had finished attending to his father, breakfast was on the table. Billy's head felt much clearer after his bath. Jacob had washed his long, greying hair and tied it back with a leather band. With fresh clothes on he looked a lot better. Bella pushed his plate in front of him when he rolled his chair over to the table.

"This is all we had." She muttered.

Billy looked down at his plate before returning his eyes to her. "We need to get some shopping in." He said mildly as he took a slice of toast and bit into it.

Bella stared at him in disbelief. Did he really not give a shit? "We have no money for food."

"Why?" Billy paused, the toast hanging limply in his hand.

"Because you gave Kay the money you stole from my room so she could buy more booze." Bella snapped.

"I never did." Billy said weakly, his memories of the previous day were hazy.

"Don't give me that bullshit." Bella put her hands on hips and glared at him. For a brief moment she reminded him of Sarah when she did the same thing. His heart recoiled in his chest.

"I would never steal..." Billy stopped speaking when he heard Jacob come up behind him.

"Well you did, dad." He said harshly. "On top of being a lousy drunk, you can add thief to your list of achievements. Mom would be so fucking proud."

"Don't you talk to me in that tone, boy." Billy's anger flared up at the mention of Sarah. "I am your father."

Jacob just looked at him disdainfully. "My father? Really? All I see is a washed up old man who hasn't got the guts to deal with life. Who the hell do you think has been looking after your sorry ass since mom died, huh? Me and Bells, that's who. You spend your days drinking away what little money we have coming in. Do you know where some of your dinner comes from, I have to go out hunting for it. Bells has sold everything she fucking owns to save your miserable hide and pay for your meds. She even pawned the locket that Charlie gave her before he died. That was all she had left of him, you selfish son of a bitch." He roared.

Billy began to shake as he stared up at the boy, no man, he no longer recognized. Jacob's eyes were more black then brown as he delivered some harsh truths. He had finally had enough, no longer able to hide what he was feeling. He was disgusted with his father and deeply ashamed. Bella came up beside him and put a calming hand on his arm. "Enough, Jake."

Jacob glared at his father before pulling Bella into his arms and burying his head in her shoulder to hide his expression. Billy just continued to stare at them in stunned silence, not knowing what to say.

* * *

Leah watched her boyfriend shoot some hoops. She sat on the grass verge and admired his athleticism as he bounced the basketball on the ground, the muscles in his legs bunching as he danced past her younger brother, Seth before reaching up high and throwing the ball easily through the hoop. Seth groaned in annoyance.

"How do you do that?" He complained.

Samuel Uley laughed at the twelve year old's pouting face. He got him around the neck with one arm and ruffled his hair playfully before releasing him. "It takes practice, Seth."

"I've been practicing but I just can't get it right." Seth replied in defeat.

"Don't get down." Sam picked up the basketball and threw it at the younger boy. Seth caught it easily. "Practice on your own for a bit while I talk to your sister."

Seth pulled a face. "Please don't make out with her in front of me. I've just eaten."

Sam laughed as he strode confidently over to Leah and sat down next to her. "Your brother just warned me not to make out with you."

Leah didn't laugh like she usually did. She had a frown on her face and looked worried. Sam brushed her hair to one side so he could see her better. "Come on, Clearwater what's eating at you?"

Leah brushed his hand away. "Nothing."

"I know you better then that Lee. You can trust me." Sam said softly.

Leah glanced up at his handsome face. His dark eyes were giving her that special look that made her stomach clench. They had only been dating a matter of weeks but she already knew that she was falling in love with him, although she hadn't yet said the words. "It's a secret." She whispered.

Sam touched her cheek gently. "Tell me, Lee. Maybe I can help."

Leah bit her lip for a moment before finally deciding she needed some advice. "It's my friend, Bella. She's in trouble and I'm not sure how to help."

* * *

Billy sat in his room, staring at the wall. His hands were shaking so much he couldn't steer his chair in any direction. The longing for alcohol to wipe away his burdens surged through him. Jacob and Bella were in the other room, he could hear them talking but couldn't make out what they were saying. It had taken Bella ages to calm his son down. Jacob's whole body had been trembling as if he had a fever. Billy could see the perspiration on his brow.

He took some deep breaths to steady himself, muttering that it couldn't be possible. He was wrong, he had to be. There was no reason for anything like this to happen at all. As far as he understood La Push had been clear of any sign for decades. He continued to sit, worry furrowing his brow as he tried to talk himself into believing that there was nothing wrong with Jacob and it had been his anger that had made him that way.

This went on for an hour as he fretted silently. He needed a fix, he couldn't take anymore. Billy hated thinking or feeling. He liked numb. That way he didn't have to deal with anything. He had to contact Kay but the phone was in the other room. He cursed the fact that Jacob and Bella were not in school.

While these thoughts were whirring through his head he heard someone knock at the door. He listened eagerly, hoping it was Kay but it was a male voice who answered Bella when she opened the door. Billy heard the sound of several pairs of heavy boots walking along the floor. His door was suddenly opened revealing his friend Harry Clearwater. Next to him stood Sam Uley. Billy's eyes were bugging out of his head as he looked at the younger man. Like Jake, Sam seemed to have grown overnight. He was well over six feet, his muscles bulging as he crossed his arms intimidatingly.

"What are you doing here?" Billy muttered, his voice quavering.

Harry glared down at his friend, anger and disappointment clear on his face. "We're here to pull your head out of your ass, Billy Black." He said sternly.

"What are you talking about?"

"I know what has been going on now." Harry motioned for Sam to approach Billy and move his chair.

"Where are you taking me?" Billy demanded weakly as Sam pushed his chair out of the room and down the narrow hall.

"To the one person who will shame you into realizing what you've done." Harry replied grimly, following closely behind.

Jacob and Bella were standing side by side looking bewildered. Harry gave them an encouraging smile. "Don't worry kids." He said. "By the time I bring this old fool back he will never drink again."

They watched anxiously as Sam pushed Billy out of the house; Harry closing the door after them.

_**A/N-thanks for reading! **_


	6. Chapter 6

**Loss**

Disclaimer: all characters and copyright belong to Stephanie Meyer.

_**A/N-thank you very much for the awesome reviews. Nikki :)**_

**Part Five-Paul and Jared**

Billy stared at his wife's grave. He could feel the cans of beer that Harry had thrown onto his lap. His parting words had been. "Explain to Sarah why you're drinking yourself to death and why you are neglecting your family and your duty to your tribe. After this I'll take you to Charlie's grave and you can tell him why his daughter is covering for your ass and living in dire straits after he entrusted her into your care. There's the drink if you can't cope. I'll be back in an hour."

With these parting words Sam and Harry had retreated silently, leaving Billy alone with his wife for the first time since she had been buried there.

The wind blew Billy's hair lightly off his sweaty neck as he continued to look at Sarah's grave. Her name stood out in stark relief on the white marble, as if mocking him. There were her date of birth and the date of her death. The grave was well tended, fresh flowers were placed discreetly in small pots. The headstone was free and clear of debris and grime unlike some of the others. Billy knew it must be his son and Bella who regularly came to make sure Sarah's grave was well looked after.

His eyes closed as tears began to run down his weathered cheeks. His hand clutched one of the cans that Harry had left with him. Pain; he was feeling pain and he hated it. Harry was cruel to bring him here. Billy unconsciously popped open the can, and with a shaking hand he brought it to his lips.

"_Don't." _

_Billy's eyes snapped open as he heard her beloved voice. "Sarah?" _

_Sarah was standing by her headstone, a disappointed expression covering her beautiful face. "Don't." She whispered again._

_Billy dropped the can, the beer splashing all over his lap. He didn't even notice. He rolled his chair forward, his eyes focused on the image of his dead wife. As he drew nearer she withdrew. "Sarah, please." He begged her, reaching out. "Come back to me." _

_Sarah shook her head, her long silky black hair swishing across her shoulders. "I can never come back. I no longer belong here." _

"_But I can see you." Billy whispered hoarsely. _

"_You let me down, Billy." Sarah's dark eyes were filled with tears. "You let our children down." _

"_I tried Sarah, but it hurts. It hurts every day." Billy pleaded. "I had to numb the pain." _

_Sarah looked him up and down, the tears now spilling down her cheeks. "You are not the man I married. My Billy would have stepped up and taken control whatever happened. He would have made his children his first priority, even if he had to carry the burden alone." _

_Her words were like arrows to Billy's heart. He cringed as an icy draft ran down his back. "I tried." He said again weakly. _

"_No, you didn't." Sarah sobbed. "You drowned your sorrows in cheap alcohol and wallowed in self pity. I am ashamed of you." _

_Billy's whole body shook as he stared into her disappointed eyes. Shame and guilt hit him fully for the first time in years as he felt the numbness slip away and his emotions took over. He blinked his eyes as he watched Sarah's image fade away. "NO." He cried out. He rolled his chair toward her grave but he didn't get far because someone else was now standing in front of him._

"_Hey Billy, long time no see." Charlie Swan stood before him dressed in full uniform. _

"_Ch...Chief?" Billy ran a hand over his eyes. He was perspiring heavily. He watched as his friend strode around his chair, shaking his head in disgust. _

"_Brought the beers did you?" Charlie picked up a can and popped it open._

"_What are you doing? Where's Sarah?" Billy begged. _

_Charlie didn't answer. He lifted the can and poured the beer over Billy's head, making him gasp as the cold hit his fevered skin. He did this with each can until they were all empty. "Had enough now, Billy? Or do you want more?" He demanded. _

"_Stop it. Just stop it." Billy thrashed about in his chair. _

_Charlie knelt down in front of him. "You want me to stop." He roared. "You are the one who needs to stop. I trusted you. Sarah trusted you and this is how you repay our faith. You neglect your family, you neglect your health and you spend all day every day drinking? You are a disgrace."_

"_I lost everything that meant anything to me." Billy yelled back at him passionately. "I lost the love of my life." _

"_So did I when Renee died." Charlie hissed. "But did you see me drowning in drink? No I had to carry on because I had something else to keep me alive, my daughter, who I entrusted into your care. What about her and Jake?" _

_Guilty tears washed down Billy's face, mixing with the beer. The alcohol smell was making him feel queasy. "I just wanted to numb the pain that's all. It got out of hand." _

_Charlie pushed his face close to Billy's and glared at him. "Then stop right now, Billy Black. You have one last chance to change things before you drink yourself into an early grave." _

"_It's so hard." Billy whispered. _

"_You have it within you." Charlie stood up and began to back away from him. His image faded right before Billy's eyes. _

"_Come back, tell me what to do." He called out. _

"_You know what to do." This time it was Sarah who answered him._

_Billy felt his eyes becoming heavy. "Sarah?" He screamed before blackness overtook him. _

"Billy wake up."

The sound of Old Quil's voice made his eyes flare open. He gasped for breath. "What's going on? Where am I? Sarah?"

Old Quil loomed into view. His rheumy eyes studied Billy intently. "What did you see?"

"I saw Sarah...Charlie." Billy glanced around him. There was the heady scent of spices in the air mixed with the acrid smell of smoke. "What the hell did you do to me?"

Old Quil chuckled darkly. "I sent you to the only people who could get you to see sense."

"You forced me into a vision quest." Billy demanded.

"Yes." Old Quil didn't seem bothered by the anger in his voice. "Harry, Sam you can take him back home now."

Out of the darkness Harry appeared. He stared down at Billy and studied him too. "You better not let them down again, Billy." He remonstrated with him firmly.

Billy felt himself being lifted from the bed he had been lying on and back into his chair. It was Sam who had carried him. He looked up at his tall figure. "Is there something I should know?"

Sam, Harry and Old Quil exchanged glances. Billy frowned, he recalled the thoughts that had run through his mind earlier about the changes he was seeing in both his son and which were much more apparent in Sam. A sick feeling began to swirl in his stomach.

"Its happened hasn't it? The wolves are coming back." He said bitterly.

Sam knelt down in front of him, his dark eyes impenetrable. "Yes. I phased for the first time three months ago. I can sense that Jake will soon follow."

Billy's grief knew no bounds, he put his head in his hands and cried.

* * *

_A week later;_

Jacob and Bella were sitting at one of the picnic tables outside school eating their lunch. Leah, Seth, Quil, and Embry surrounded them. They were all watching Sam Uley have a friendly basketball match with Jared Thail. Jared was the star athlete at the small school and was rumored to be in line for a scholarship to one of the top sports colleges when he graduated. Sam was more then a match for him today however.

"I can't believe you did that, Uley." Jared yelled at him as he watched the ball slip through the hoop. "You're fucking cheating man."

"I'm not." Sam said mildly. He picked up the ball and spun it expertly on his finger.

Jared came right up into his face, his brow was covered in perspiration and his arms were shaking with his suppressed anger. "You are a freaking liar." He poked Sam in the chest. They were almost eye to eye. Lately Jared had filled out nearly as much as Sam.

Sam kept his cool, he didn't retaliate, just watched Jared carefully. "You need to keep calm." He advised quietly.

"Yeah, Jared." Leah called over to him. "It's just a game."

Jared spun round on his heel and began to march over to her. Sam's stoic expression changed, fire lit his eyes as he grabbed Jared and pulled him back round so that they were eye to eye. "Don't you dare." He warned him.

Jared's whole body shook, he wiped his brow and pulled his arm out of Sam's hold. "I need to get out of here." He muttered. With those words he fled the scene.

Leah came up to join Sam, the others were watching Jared's departing figure in stunned silence. He was the most laid back person they knew so to see him react so hotly was a surprise. "What's bitten him on the ass?" Leah asked.

"I don't know." Sam gave her a wry smile. "I better check on him though. I'll catch up with you later." He leaned down to kiss her quickly on the lips before sprinting after Jared.

"Typical." Leah muttered. "Always running off."

Bella walked up to Leah and looked at her in concern. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah." Leah lied, kicking at the dirt with her shoe.

Bella could tell she was fibbing. Sam had been disappearing a lot of late, sometimes even cancelling pre-arranged dates with Leah. His excuses were lame at best and Leah was beginning to suspect he was getting tired of her. However Bella could clearly see that Sam adored her friend. There was something else going on she was sure of it. After Sam had helped them out with Billy, she felt grateful to him.

The bell rang, signalling the end of lunch. Everyone quickly gathered their bags together and slowly walked back to the school. Bella was halfway to her history class when she remembered she had left her text book in her locker. She sighed, backtracking down the hall. It was mostly empty now as everyone had filed into class. She reached her locker and quickly unlocked it, grabbing the text book and shoving it in her bag. As she closed the metal door, a hand shot out over her shoulder and did it for her. This action made her jump and she swiveled round to see Paul Lahote standing near her, a big grin on his face.

"Well it's not often I get to see you all on your own, Swan. You've usually got your little brother attached to your side like a tick." Paul leered.

Bella grimaced in annoyance. Paul was often trying to engage her in conversation. He had asked her out several times in a roundabout way and she had rebuffed him each time. "Don't call Jake that." She muttered. "I have to get to class."

Paul blocked her path. "Come on, skip with me. I can show you some fun." He winked at her flirtatiously.

Bella groaned. "Paul you know I'm going to say no, so why bother? Just let me pass."

His expression darkened, he was obviously angry that she was pushing him away again. "You think you're something special don't you darlin?"

"No I don't. I just have good taste. Now let me through." Bella tried to push by him but he trapped her against the lockers with his arms.

"Just give in. You know you want to." Paul leaned in closer, his lips hovering just above hers.

Bella narrowed her eyes, getting ready to knee him in the balls just the way Leah had taught her. Before she could move however Paul was suddenly ripped away from her and flung across the hall. His body slammed into the wall opposite. Bella took a second to realise that it was Jacob who had physically thrown Lahote. He stood in front of her protectively, his eyes dark and his body shaking with anger.

"You touch her again Lahote and I'll rip your face off." He yelled.

Paul struggled back onto his feet. He was breathing heavily. A sly grin crossed his face as he suddenly charged Jacob, knocking into him so that they both fell back onto the floor. Bella put her hand over her mouth as she watched them begin to wrestle with each other.

_**A/N-thanks for reading! **_


	7. Chapter 7

**Loss**

Disclaimer: all characters and copyright belong to Stephanie Meyer.

_**A/N-thank you so much for the lovely reviews. Nikki :)**_

**Part Six-The Wolf**

Bella ran into the Black's house, slung her bag on the floor and searched frantically around for Billy. She eventually found him at the back of the house in the little room he used for carving. He had got back into his hobby as a way of distracting himself while he was alone in the house during the day. In between this he was now regularly attending AA meetings, set up by Sue Clearweater, who was a nurse at the hospital.

"Are you alright Bella?" He asked as he watched her standing in the doorway, trying to catch her breath. It was just past one in the afternoon and she should still be at school. He put his wood carving tools down and looked at her worriedly.

"It's Jake." Bella gasped out as she took in great gulping breaths. Her heart was racing at a hundred miles an hour.

"What about him?" Billy questioned, alarmed by the frantic look on her face.

"He got into a fight with Paul Lahote. They were really going for it. I've never seen anything like it, they were literally throwing themselves across the hall. When Jake pushed Paul against the wall a great chunk came out of it." Bella told him.

"Is he injured? Where is he?" Billy demanded.

"That's just it. I don't know." Bella said desperately. "The teachers were alerted by all the noise and came out to investigate and it made Paul take off. Jake was still so mad, he ran after him. I tried to follow but I was too slow. The last time I saw them they were bolting toward the woods. I didn't know what else to do so I came home."

Billy rolled his chair forward and took Bella's hand in his own. She was on the verge of crying, which was odd for him to see because she usually managed to keep her cool under the most trying of circumstances. "Don't fret now. Let me make a few calls and we'll try and track him down. Go and make yourself a drink and try to remain calm, okay."

Bella nodded her head. She swiped her hand across her eyes and disappeared toward the kitchen. When she was out of sight, Billy sagged in his chair. He was very concerned. It seemed that Sam's hint that his son was on the verge of phasing had proved prophetic. That was the only thing that could explain Jacob's irrational behavior. Billy knew his son was very overprotective of Bella under normal circumstances, but if Paul had tried to come on to her, which was very likely knowing that boy's reputation, then that would be enough to send him over the edge. He maneuvered his chair toward the phone and picked it up. He dialed Harry's number and waited impatiently for an answer.

"Hello." Harry's sounded tired.

"Harry, it's Billy. We've got a problem."

"What's wrong?" Harry asked, suddenly sounding more alert.

"It's Jake and probably Paul too. I think they may be on the verge of phasing or may already have done so." Billy whispered urgently. "Bella saw them fighting and they ran off toward the forest."

"Damn it." Harry muttered. "Sam has enough to deal with already. I just found out that Jared Thail phased not long ago."

"What?" Billy said in shock. "This is not right. Something must be coming if they are all changing so quickly."

"Yes." Harry agreed. He was concerned about his own son. Seth carried the wolf gene too, but he was only twelve. "I'll go and see if I can find out what is going on and then I'll call you back."

"Thanks Harry." Billy ended the call. He hit his fist on the arm of his wheelchair, cursing the fact that he was stuck in it and couldn't help out. He was extremely worried about Jacob and the others. All he could do now was wait for news and keep his concerns private so as not to alarm Bella.

* * *

Bella looked out of her window into the dark night. There was still no sign of Jacob and there hadn't been for hours. She had retreated to her room after getting frustrated with Billy's cagey answers. Harry and then Sam had turned up throughout the evening and the men had retreated outside to have a private meeting. Bella had tried to eavesdrop but unfortunately couldn't make out their urgent whispers. When Billy had come back inside she had asked him whether they had found Jake. He had taken her hand and patted it, telling her that Jake was fine but he was going to be staying away for a few days to get his head together.

Bella hadn't been satisfied with this vague answer at all. She had followed Billy around demanding more information, but he continued to rebuff her questions, just giving her lame excuses. In the end she knew he wasn't going to supply her with what she needed to know. She planned on getting hold of Sam at school the next day. She hoped that he would be more forthcoming. He obviously knew something.

She continued to stare out of her window, the moon was full and it cast a small light, creating shadows around the house. She blinked her eyes when she thought she saw one of the shadows move. Moving closer to the window she peered out into the darkness, trying to ascertain whether she was going mad or there was actually something out there. Bella concentrated hard on the spot where she had seen the the shadows ripple. A few tense seconds passed before she saw it again. It looked like a tail was whisking from side to side. Maybe a stray dog had wandered up to the house, seeking food. Intrigued, and wanting to take her mind off of worrying about Jacob, Bella decided to go and investigate.

She slid out of her room and down the hall, trying to keep as quiet as possible so Billy wouldn't hear her. When she reached the front door she pulled on a warm coat and slipped outside. The chill hit her full in the face as she tiptoed across the damp grass. She tugged her coat closer around her and headed for the spot where she saw what she thought was a dog. A faint whimpering sound convinced her even further that what she was seeking was indeed a canine creature. Bella moved faster and she soon reached the side of the house. There it was, she could see it now. A long tail wagged from side to side.

"Here doggy." Bella stepped closer. "It's okay. I won't hurt you."

A snuffling sound made her pause. She stopped where she was and reached out her hand. "Come on, I won't hurt you. Come here." She cooed.

Slowly, inch by tortuous inch, the creature moved toward her, it's large form finally emerging from the shadows. When Bella saw what the creature truly was she had to clap a hand over her mouth to stop herself screaming. The largest wolf she had ever seen, it's russet fur gleaming in the silvery light from the moon, stood before her. It's eyes were large and black as night; the firm strong jaw stood way above her head. Bella was frozen to the spot, she stared up and up until her eyes were riveted on the wolf's intelligent ones.

"You're beautiful." She breathed, taking her hand away from her mouth. She should be afraid, she knew she should, but something about the wolf's calm demeanor reassured her.

The wolf whined as he lowered his head. Bella wasn't sure why she thought the creature was male, she just had the impression that the wolf was a he. Maybe because of the size of it's girth and the magnificent way he carried himself. She approached him cautiously, her hand outstretched. She was dying to sink her hands in his soft fur. A sigh escaped her lips as she did so. She stroked his fur, paying special attention to the underneath of his jaw. The wolf closed his eyes and began to make a humming sound as if he was in bliss.

"You like that, don't you wolf." Bella giggled. The wolf opened one eye lazily before closing it again. "Are you hungry?"

A low growl rumbled deep in the wolf's throat.

"I take that as a yes." Bella said softly. "Wait here. Seeing as Jake has abandoned me you can have his share of dinner."

The wolf whined mournfully, pushing his nose into her hand as if he was trying to tell her something. "It's fine." She whispered. "I promise not to tell. Wait here." She spun round and ran off through the grass back into the house.

* * *

"I asked Sam and he just shut me down." Leah said grudgingly the next day as she sat with Bella at the same picnic table as the day before. None of the boys were in, Jake, Jared, Paul and Sam hadn't turned up for school. "I asked dad and he made up same lame excuse too."

"Just like Billy." Bella took a bite of her sandwich, even though she wasn't very hungry. "They are all hiding something and I'm sick of it."

"Me too." Leah agreed. "You know I'm beginning to wonder why I'm with Sam. I make all the effort and he just keeps letting me down."

Bella put a comforting hand over hers. "I don't know what's going on but I've seen the way he is around you. He loves you I'm sure of it. You know I wouldn't say it if I didn't think so. There is something going on here that is being hidden from us and I'm determined to find out what."

"Good luck with that." Leah said bitterly. "The men in this tribe are good at keeping the women in the dark."

Bella sighed, not disputing that fact. Even Leah's mother, Sue, had been questioning her husband's activities of late and they had flaming rows over his refusal to divulge what was going on. Seth was at home today because he had a fever. Sue had wanted to take him to the hospital to get checked out when she saw how high his temperature was. But Harry was standing guard outside his son's room and refusing to let her near Seth, just repeating the usual mantra_ that everything was under control. _

Leah had only come into school to escape the rows. The bell went again and the two girls slowly headed back inside, both their minds far away as they worried about the men in their life.

* * *

"I asked Billy again and he was still being cagey." Bella complained. She threw the biscuit in the air and the wolf caught it easily, snapping his jaws together and swallowing it whole.

For the past two nights the wolf had reappeared outside the house. Bella would be stationed at her window and as soon as she saw the russet shadow pass by, she would pull on her coat and run outside to greet it. They usually retreated to the fringes of the forest so that no one could see them. Bella was lying against the wolfs side as she continued to talk. He was a good listener and it soothed her to be able to talk about her feelings.

She didn't question where the mysterious wolf had come from, in fact it never entered her head how odd the whole scenario was. All that mattered to her was that she had someone else beside Leah to confide in. She was missing Jacob badly. She hadn't been without him by her side since she was ten years old and it felt weird that he hadn't tried to contact her, in fact it was downright upsetting that he had made no attempt to see her. Billy trotted out the same old excuse, Jake was feeling pressured and needed some time out and was staying with some family friends on the Makah res.

"I mean what about me?" Bella continued to unburden herself as she threw another biscuit in the air for the wolf to catch. "I don't get to just disappear and have time alone. He begged me you know. Jake begged me to stay with him when I felt like I wanted to run away from things. I did as he asked. I stayed and supported him and this is how he returns the favor. I am so fucking angry wolf."

Frustrated tears ran out of her eyes and the wolf made a whining sound as he rested his head on top of hers. Bella buried her face in his warm fur and cried softly. "I never thought Jake would abandon me wolf. Out of everyone I've lost in my life I never expected him to just go away and leave me alone."

The wolf snuffled against her hair, gently rubbing the side of his head against hers as if to comfort her. Bella raised her tear stained face and began to rub along his lower jaw. The faint humming sound that she loved was music to her ears as the wolf closed his eyes in contentment. "At least I have you wolf." She murmured. "I don't know how I would have got through the last few days without you. Promise you won't abandon me too?"

The wolf wrapped his whole body around Bella comfortingly. She smiled as she rested her head back against his side. The humming sound increased in volume and she fell asleep with the soothing sound echoing in her ears.

_**A/N-thanks for reading!**_


	8. Chapter 8

**Loss**

Disclaimer: all characters and copyright belong to Stephanie Meyer.

_**A/N-thank you for the kind reviews on this story. Nikki :)**_

**Part Seven**

A week went by with no sign or word from Jacob. Bella found herself getting angrier as the days passed. Leah too was in a foul mood as Sam began to avoid spending time with her too. She would see him briefly as he was dashing about on so called errands, but he would make lame excuses as to why he couldn't go out on a date. Added to that she was worried about Seth. Her younger brother was still encased in his room. He was suffering from a high fever and her mother was getting increasingly worried. Harry refused to take their son to a hospital and the blazing rows had stepped up a notch.

Both girls strolled the school halls with gloomy expressions. None of the boys had returned to the school, not even Jared or Paul. Sam was mostly absent now. They knew that something big was going on but the men still refused to tell them a thing. Billy's excuses that Jacob was on some sort of retreat to de-stress himself sounded like a fabrication to Bella.

"My mom really lashed out at my dad this morning. Sethy was thrashing around in his bed. You should have seen the sweat pouring off of his body. My dad still refuses to let him be seen by a doctor. My mom is on the verge of calling the police to have Sethy forcibly removed. She is even talking about divorce." Leah confessed, her eyes wet with tears.

Bella was alarmed. She couldn't believe that the normally jovial Harry would put his son's life at risk like this. She didn't know what to say to comfort her friend. So she just put her arms around Leah and gave her a comforting hug.

"Well, well what's going on here?" Quil Ateara's voice made them pull apart. "Decided to swap sides?"

"Oh shut up you idiot." Leah muttered as she glared at him.

Embry joined them. He pushed Quil as he passed. "Excuse his crass behavior. Have you heard from Jake, Bella?"

Bella shook her head. "No. Nothing." She replied bitterly.

"Has he really gone to some sort of retreat?" Embry questioned as he came up beside Bella. "I wish I could go and get away from my mom for a while."

Bella gave him a sympathetic smile. She knew how bad Kay could get when she was drinking. Unlike Billy, who seemed finally to have turned a corner, Embry's mom still refused to get any help. "I'm sorry, Em."

"No I'm sorry she made Billy worse by getting his drink. I tried to stop her going over there, but..." His voice tailed off as he looked at her guiltily.

"It's alright." Bella said softly. She took his hand in her own and squeezed it. "There was nothing you could have done."

Embry smiled at her shyly. They continued to gaze at each other for a moment before Quil barged between them and broke the spell. "Now her bodyguard is out the way I see you are trying to make a play for Bella now. Nice one dude, using the sympathy card."

Leah groaned as she cuffed Quil across the back of his head. "You really are a douche, Ateara."

Quil rubbed the back of his head and sidled up to Leah, batting his lashes at her. "Aww sweetheart you don't have to hit me to get my attention. I'm yours whenever you want now that Sam has moved on to better things."

Hurt flashed in Leah's eyes at his words. Bella and Embry both hit Quil hard around the back of his head, making him cry out. "Hey."

"You deserved that." Embry said fiercely. He grabbed his friend by the collar of his shirt and began to drag him away. "I'll see you at lunch, Bella." He called out to her as he walked away.

"That boy has a major crush on you." Leah said wryly. "Lucky Jakey boy isn't around to see it. Ateara's right about Jake not being happy about it."

Bella frowned. "It's none of Jake's damn business. He can't even be bothered to call me, so stuff him."

Leah smirked at Bella. She took her arm and began to follow the two boys down the corridor. "Yeah stuff the lot of them. We deserve better."

"You said it." Bella agreed.

* * *

Embry was looking in disgust at his sandwich, the bread was moldy and as for what his mom had put inside...he pushed it away from him. Bella felt sadness wash over her. Out of all of them Embry had the shittiest home life. At least she had Jake with her through the worst times, but Embry had to cope alone. Well, she used to have Jake to support her, she corrected herself. The thought made her anger at him come back. She distracted herself by emptying her lunch box and passing half her lunch to Embry.

"Here you go. I've made too much." She smiled as she handed him the food.

"I can't take that." Embry said softly.

"Yes you can." Bella replied firmly.

He locked eyes with her for a moment before smiling shyly at her. Bella felt her face heat up. Phew that boy would be a heart breaker one day if he kept smiling like that. She tore her eyes from his and began to eat what was left. "So where's Quil?" She mumbled.

"In detention." Embry rolled his eyes. "He chatted up a seniors girlfriend and got into a fight."

Bella shook her head in disbelief. "He never learns does he?"

"No, it seems not." Embry smiled at her again, making her blush. What the hell was wrong with her?

Thankfully Leah turned up at that point. She threw her bag down on the grass and sat next to Bella. "I've done it."

"Done what?" Bella asked in confusion.

Leah took a deep breath before answering. "I just saw Sam shooting past. I pulled him over and asked him one last time to spend some time with me tonight. He told me he was really busy doing some stupid tribal stuff, so I told him if he didn't come over tonight at eight then we were through."

Bella choked on her lunch. "Are you serious?"

"Yes." Leah said adamantly. "I am not going to be made a fool of."

Bella exchanged a look with Embry. They could both see how much this hurt Leah to issue such an ultimatum. Bella hoped that it wouldn't blow up in her friend's face. All she could do was support her if it did.

* * *

"Still no word from Jake." Bella complained as she threw the biscuit in the air and the wolf caught it between his jaws easily. "It's been over a week. I'm beginning to give up now."

The wolf swallowed the biscuit down and then nudged her gently with his nose. Bella smiled up at him sadly. "Everything has gone so wrong, wolf. It looks like Lee and Sam are going to split up. Sue and Harry are on the verge of divorce because he won't allow Seth to be taken to a hospital. Billy keeps making up lame excuses for Jake's absence. None of the others have returned to school, not even that idiot, Paul."

A low growl rumbled in the wolf's chest at the mention of Lahote. She laughed quietly and rubbed under his jaw. The growl turned to a gentle humming noise as he closed his eyes in bliss. "You really love that, don't you?"

The wolf opened one eye and nudged her with his nose again. Bella continued to rub under his jaw for a few minutes more. After a while she stopped and stood up, sighing regretfully. The wolf opened his large eyes and gazed at her in confusion. "I'm sorry wolf but I have to go."

The wolf whined and pushed on her gently, as if trying to get her to sit back down. She stroked behind his ears for a few seconds. "I'm sorry but I can't stay tonight. Embry is coming over. He needs help with his calculus homework. I'll see you again tomorrow."

The wolf growled again, seemingly not happy about this interruption. Bella kissed him on the tip of his nose before running out into the open, calling out goodbye as she went. The russet wolf stayed within the fringe of the trees, still growling as he watched her disappear back into the house.

* * *

Embry stared at his text book before dropping his head onto it. "It makes no damn sense."

Bella tapped the back of his head with her pen. "I thought Jake used to be impatient. You have to think things through carefully. Remember it is an equation. You follow the solution until you solve the puzzle."

Embry raised his head and glanced at her. "That sounds really lame."

Bella started to laugh. "I know. To be honest I'm so tired I don't know what the hell I'm saying. Come on we'll work on another few then we can call it a night."

Embry groaned. He reluctantly pulled his book back in front of him and began to slowly work through the sums; Bella coaching him as he went.

* * *

"Ta dah." Bella placed the plate of food in front of Embry. "What do you think?"

"You made me dinner?" Embry said, his voice was husky as he spoke. Bella could swear she saw a hint of moisture in his eyes.

"Of course. Come on, tuck in. It's just you and me. Billy is at one of those infernal tribal meetings again. I don't know what is going on, but there seems to be a meeting every night of the week lately." Bella sat opposite Embry and picked up her knife and fork.

Embry flashed her his sweet smile before beginning to eat. She watched him ladle in the lasagne greedily and smiled in satisfaction before eating herself. They ate in relative silence, both of them occasionally exchanging smiles and shy glances.

"Would you like some dessert?" Bella asked when they were finished. Her voice sounded strange, even to her own ears.

"Yeah, thanks." Embry said eagerly. His dark eyes were shining. He stood and helped her clear up the plates. Their fingers touched briefly as they went for the same plate. Bella pulled her hand back and laughed nervously.

"You put these in the sink. I'll get the dessert." She handed him the plates and dashed into the kitchen.

Embry felt his heart hammering in his chest. He took a deep breath and followed her into the kitchen, hoping that he didn't make a fool of himself. He was dying to ask her out. He dumped the plates in the sink and leaned casually against the kitchen cupboards as he watched her cut him a large slice of chocolate cake. Bella spun round and handed it to him.

"You spoil me." He said, smiling at her.

Bella returned his smile tremulously. "Go on, tell me what you think?"

Embry took a bite. The sweet chocolate slid down his throat as he swallowed it. It tasted heavenly. "It's delicious, thanks."

Bella's smile widened as she took a bite out of her much smaller slice. She got some chocolate on her nose as she bit into it, making Embry laugh.

"What?" She said, looking bewildered.

"You've got chocolate smeared on your face." Embry put his plate down and came to stand in front of her.

"Oh." Bella tried to wipe off the chocolate but was missing the spot completely.

"Let me." Embry whispered. He reached out and gently wiped the top of her nose with his fingers.

Bella stared at him as he continued to touch her face reverently. "You are so beautiful, Bella."

"Em..." Bella felt nervous. She continued to look at him as he cupped her face in the palm of his hand.

"Bella." Embry gazed into her eyes as he leaned closer, his heart felt like it was going to beat out of his chest.

The front door slammed making them pull apart in shock. Bella ran out into the hall, thinking it was Billy who had returned from his meeting. It wasn't. Jacob stood in the entrance, wearing nothing but a pair of shorts slung low on his hips. His feet were bare and his short black hair was messy. His dark eyes captured hers as he slowly stalked toward her. Bella felt frozen to the spot; he was here, really here, and taller and broader then ever.

"Jake?" She whispered.

He didn't answer her. Instead he closed the gap and wrapped her in his strong arms, lifting her off of the floor and holding her tight to his chest. "I'm back, Bells. I'm home. I promise I will never leave you again." He mumbled as he pressed his lips into her hair.

_**A/N-thanks for reading!**_


	9. Chapter 9

**Loss**

Disclaimer: all characters and copyright belong to Stephanie Meyer.

_**A/N-thank you all for the lovely reviews. Nikki :)**_

**Part Eight-Bella's Safe Place**

Jacob picked Bella up and carried her into the living room; he sat down and pulled her onto his lap, making sure to keep his arms firmly wrapped around her. Bella was still too stunned by his unexpected reappearance to react. One part of her was joyful that he was safely back at home, the other was mad that he thought he could waltz in here as if nothing had happened. While all these thoughts were whirring through her head, Embry approached them. He had a strange look on his face as he stared at Bella perched on Jacob's lap.

"You're back then." He said unnecessarily to Jacob.

"I am." Jacob replied without looking at his friend. His whole attention was focused on Bella. He ran his fingers through her long hair.

"Where have you been?" Embry said in a tight voice.

"Oh here and there." Jacob muttered distractedly.

"Really?" Embry snapped. "Didn't think to call Bella and let her know you were okay? She has been frantic worrying about you."

Jacob finally raised his head and focused on his friend. "What's your problem?"

"My problem?" Embry shook his head in disbelief. "Are you really that dense, dude?"

"Hey, stop it, both of you." Bella finally spoke. She struggled out of Jacob's hold. He was reluctant to release her, but he eventually let her stand back on her feet.

Embry reached out and took her hand, pulling her carefully so that she was standing next to him. Jacob watched them with a frown on his face. "Am I missing something here?" He demanded.

Bella sighed. "You've missed a lot since you took off." She retorted, a bitter edge to her tone.

"Have I?" Jacob narrowed his eyes as he stood back up, he towered over Embry as he glared at him. "You seem a bit overprotective Embry. Why is that?"

"I am just looking out for Bella." Embry replied. "I happen to care about her."

"Really?" Jacob began to stride forward but Bella slipped between them, putting a hand on their chests to keep them apart.

"Enough. Em..." she turned to him and gave him an understanding smile. "Thanks for defending me, but Jake and I need to talk. I'll see you at school tomorrow, okay."

Embry gazed at her in concern, before flicking his eyes back to Jacob. "I think I should stay."

"What for?" Jacob's voice sounded loud in the silence.

Bella gave him a warning glance. "Embry, I'm fine. Go on home. I'll see you tomorrow." She said again firmly.

Embry reluctantly nodded. "Just treat her right." He said to Jacob before finally taking his leave.

Jacob stared after his departing friend in disbelief. "What the hell is his problem?"

Bella stood in front of him, her hands on her hips as she glared up at his confused face. "You are unbelievable. His problem is you. You just took off and left me alone, Jake. You left no note, you haven't called. I have been worried sick. Now you just stroll in here like nothing has happened."

Jacob grimaced at the hurt he could hear underneath the anger. "Dad told you I was fine, didn't he?"

Bella threw her hands up in the air as she began to pace. "As if I was going to take his word. The Jake I know wouldn't just disappear on me to go to some sort of retreat. I didn't believe that lie for a second. Now tell me where you've really been?"

Jacob looked at her intently, his dark eyes pleading for her understanding. He opened his mouth as if to speak, but he coughed as if the words were stuck in his throat. "I can't." He said in frustration.

"Bullshit." Bella came right up to him and poked him in the chest. "Tell me right now or that's it."

Jacob reached out for her but she stepped back. "Bells, I can't. You have to just trust that I was never far away and I had no choice about my absence. I was unable to contact you."

"Why?" She demanded again.

Jacob coughed again as he struggled to speak. He curled his hands into fists in annoyance. "I can't." He muttered.

"Well now I understand just what you really think of me." Bella said brokenly.

"Please Bells..." Jacob begged as he tried to embrace her.

"Go to hell, Jake." Bella hissed as she spun round and fled to her room, slamming the door behind her.

* * *

Leah reached out and touched the huge black wolf's fur. She ran her fingers through the thick coat, marveling at how soft it was. The wolf closed his eyes in contentment. She had been meeting up with the wolf daily. It had appeared outside her window one night when she was feeling at her lowest. She had gone out to investigate, surprised at herself that she wasn't scared of the huge creature. Something about the way he carried himself and the look he gave her from his large, dark eyes made her feel as if she could trust him.

"I only have a few minutes then I have to get back inside." Leah sad regretfully. "Sam is due here at eight...well I hope he is. I gave him an ultimatum wolf. I am not going to be treated like an idiot."

The wolf rubbed the side of his head against hers. Leah closed her eyes for a moment, reassured that at least she had someone who understood. She didn't know what she would have done without the wolf. He had become the one person, besides Bella, that she could confide in. Her family were all preoccupied with Seth's mysterious illness and Harry's refusal to let him be seen by a doctor. Leah had fled the house when her parent's began one of their numerous rows about it.

"I have to go now." Leah whispered reluctantly. "Emily is due tonight as well and I'm dreading it. The atmosphere in the house is awful at the moment."

The wolf whined and pushed his nose into her hand. Leah sighed and kissed the tip of his muzzle as she finally began to leave. "I'll see you soon." She murmured.

The wolf watched Leah head back into her house before he retreated further into the forest.

* * *

She could hear her parents yelling as soon as she opened the door. Leah winced as she heard a loud crash. Her mother must have thrown something at her father. Sue was renowned for her quick temper and lately most of the household ornaments had been on the receiving end of it. She made her way down the hall so she could check in on Seth, however Harry was on guard duty again and Sue was standing in front of him, raging. Leah retreated back down the hall. As she made her way to the kitchen she glanced at the clock, it was five to eight. Sam had only a few minutes before his time was up.

Leah made herself a drink and sat at the table, nervously tapping her fingers on the wood as she counted down the seconds. Right on schedule there was a knock on the door. Leah sprinted down the hall and opened it. Sam stood there, a pair of shorts slung low on his hips. He had a desperate look on his face as he gazed at her.

"You came." She breathed.

"Of course I came." Sam swept her up into his arms and hugged her tight to his chest. "You have to trust me, Lee. I know I have been AWOL recently but I have a lot going on."

Leah lay her head on his chest and closed her eyes. She reveled in the feel of his strong arms wrapped around her. Sam was the only one who could make her feel dainty. She was just shy of six feet tall herself and had the lean build of a track runner. Sam pressed his lips into her hair as he carried her into the house. Harry and Sue were still arguing and their loud voices hurt his ears.

"How's Seth?" He asked.

Leah sighed as she felt him put her back down. "Not good. Dad is still refusing to take him to hospital."

Sam stroked her hair back from her face. "He has his reason's Lee."

"So you keep saying." Leah muttered. "But he is my little brother. Why can't you tell me?"

"I wish I could." Sam replied bitterly. "You have to trust that your dad and I know what we're doing."

Leah studied him for a moment before another knock on the door made her jump.

"Who's that?" Sam asked.

"Must be Emily." Leah pulled away from him reluctantly and went back down the hall to answer the door for a second time.

"Leah Clearwater you have grown." Emily Young held out her arms and embraced her niece tightly.

"I'm glad you're here Aunt Em." Leah said in relief as she hugged the older woman back. "Maybe you can knock some sense into my dad."

Emily put on a stern expression. "Don't you worry child I can sort out my stupid brother. Where is Harry?"

"Just follow the sounds of their raised voices." Leah replied wryly.

Emily adjusted her clothes, she was a rotund lady, just like her brother. A hearty appetite ran in the family. Leah watched her march down the hall toward Seth's room. As Emily passed the kitchen Sam popped his head out and greeted her. Emily stopped and smiled at him. "Ah, you must be Sam. My niece has told me all about you."

Sam smiled weakly. "Yeah? All good I hope."

Emily laughed. "Mostly. Just make sure you treat her right otherwise I might have to kick your butt."

Sam didn't know what to say to that, he just nodded wordlessly. Emily laughed at his dumbfounded expression before continuing on to confront her brother.

Leah came up to Sam and smiled. "What did you think of Aunt Em?"

"She's scary." Sam gave a fake shudder.

"Yeah, she sure is." Leah agreed. She felt much better now that her aunt was here and that Sam had taken her ultimatum seriously and come to see her. She let him embrace her again. "Sam...I love you." She whispered.

Sam hugged her tight before leaning down and kissing her gently on the lips. "I love you too, Lee Lee." He replied; making her glow inside.

* * *

Bella fumed in her bedroom for a good hour before she finally caved in and opened the door. As she did so, Jacob fell in. He had been leaning against it, waiting for her to calm down. Bella clapped her hand over her mouth as she tried to stifle her amusement. Jacob grinned at her as he jumped nimbly back onto his feet.

"Nice one, Bells." He conceded.

"I hate you, Jake." Bella declared, the smile on her face bellying her words.

Jacob's expression softened. "I do too. I'm sorry, Bells. You have to believe me. If I could tell you what is going on I would. But right now I am forbidden to."

Bella scrutinized him for a moment. "Does this involve Sam, Jared and Paul too?" She asked.

Jacob nodded. "It does. Please honey, just trust me." He pleaded, holding out his hands.

Bella took them in her own and laced their fingers together. "You are the only one I do trust, Jake." She confessed. "Just don't go off without telling me again, please."

Jacob breathed a sigh of relief. He tugged on her hands until she was standing in front of him, mere inches between them. Bella could feel an intense heat radiating from his body, it was somehow comforting. "I promise that I will never be away from you again." He vowed. "This was a one off, something I had no control over."

"Okay, I believe you." Bella whispered. She lay her head on his chest and closed her eyes. She was back in the one place she felt safest; Jacob's arms.

_**A/N-thanks for reading!**_


	10. Chapter 10

**Loss**

Disclaimer: all characters and copyright belong to Stephanie Meyer.

_**A/N-thank you for the awesome reviews. I really appreciate it. Nikki :)**_

**Part Nine-Jealousy**

Jacob took Bella's hands in his own before he left with Billy for the tribal meeting. "I won't be long, Bells. You still trust me, don't you?"

Bella sighed as she nodded. "As frustrating as it is to be kept in the dark, yes I do trust you."

"Thank you." Jacob smiled in relief, glad that she wasn't angry at him. He leaned down and pressed his lips into her hair.

"Jake." Billy called out to him. "Harry and Sam are here. We need to go."

Jacob pulled Bella into a hug before reluctantly following after his dad. Bella ran to the window and watched as she saw Harry's big, black truck pull away and drive out of sight. The house seemed quiet without the others. Bella roamed around, wondering what to do with herself. She didn't want to watch television and she was up to date with her homework. So that left cleaning. She groaned as she got the necessary utensils to help her do the chores and got stuck in.

* * *

Two hours later and Bella glanced around the house in satisfaction. She had cleaned the bathroom, done the laundry and hoovered the house from top to bottom. The kitchen counters were gleaming where she had scrubbed them down so hard. It was a job well done. She began to put her cleaning stuff away when there was a knock on the door. Maybe it was Leah coming over for a visit. When Bella had spoken to her friend the night before to let her know about Jacob's return, Leah had happily told her that things had gone well between her and Sam.

Bella wandered into the hall and opened the door. She was surprised to see Embry standing there looking nervous. He smiled at her shyly and fidgeted awkwardly. "Hey Bella."

"Hey Embry." She greeted him. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah." Embry said quickly. He held something out to her. "Um... I've brought this for you."

Bella looked at him in confusion. She took the small box which had been carefully wrapped in paper. "You shouldn't have got me anything."

"I wanted to." The nervousness left Embry's eyes as he gazed at her intently. "Open it."

Feeling curious, Bella ripped the paper off the box and opened it carefully. Inside were earrings, obviously handmade from some sort of polished wood. They were made in the shape of an oval and had an unusual carving on them. "These are lovely." She murmured, taking one out of the box and holding it up to the light. The delicate earring reflected the light from the weak sun.

"Do you like them?" Embry asked eagerly. He had shoved his hands in his pockets.

"Of course I do." Bella smiled at him gently as she put the earring back in the box. "I can't take them though, I'm sorry."

Embry's face looked stricken at her rejection. "But I made them for you."

"You made them?" Bella paused as she looked at them again, the work was so exquisite. "It didn't cost you anything?"

"No." Embry quickly reassured her. "I had the wood already and the little silver holders are from some of my mom's old earrings. I just adapted them to fit these ones. Please take them."

Bella nodded. "I will, they are beautiful. Thank you, Embry." She quickly took them both out of the box and placed them in her ears. "What do you think?"

Embry reached out and touched them, making them swing from her lobes. "They are beautiful, just like you."

Bella felt herself blush. She cleared her throat awkwardly, not really knowing what to say. "Do you feel like getting some food from the diner?" She asked him after a moment of excruciating silence. "I feel hungry."

"I can't afford it Bella." Embry confessed as he dropped his eyes to the floor in embarrassment.

Bella cursed her stupidity. She hooked her arm through his and closed the front door behind her. "It's my treat." She babbled. "Cora, the owner of the diner, always gives me a huge discount. She used to be fond of my dad back in the day."

Embry raised his head and smiled at her shyly. He took her hand in his own and laced their fingers together. "Only if you're sure."

"I am." Bella stated firmly. "I want to show off my lovely present."

Embry's face brightened as he gazed at her adoringly.

* * *

Jacob came back from the tribal meeting in a bad mood. It hadn't gone well. His frustration at the thought that his future was now out of his control riled him. The elders had laid out in no uncertain terms exactly what was expected of him, Sam, Jared and Paul. They had given them the title of protectors and it was their job to patrol the tribal lands and keep La Push safe from the cold ones, which he had only ever heard about in legends. Just like the spirit wolves, vampires were real. Old Quil had made it clear that there would be others joining them soon, namely Seth, who was on the verge of changing. It seemed to be taking the youngster longer to phase, maybe because of his young age. Harry had been forced to keep his face stoic as Old Quil spoke about his son. Jacob could see how hard it was for him.

What had really angered him was the assumption by the old men that he would lead this newly formed pack of spirit wolves. So far Sam had been taking charge, carefully guiding them through their first baby steps of getting used to their new bodies. Jacob had flatly refused to take on the responsibility, stating he wasn't ready and didn't ask for this dubious honour. The elders had been shocked and angry that he would refuse to take on the burden of Alpha. They argued it was his destiny and his birthright. Jacob had stubbornly stuck to his guns. He would carry out his duties, but he would not lead. He pointed out that Sam was doing well in the role and they all trusted him.

The elders had retreated and had a private discussion amongst themselves. When they returned Old Quil had intoned that for the foreseeable future they would agree to Sam Uley becoming the Alpha until such time as Jacob grew mature enough to accept his destiny. Wanting to avoid prolonging the meeting, Jacob had agreed.

He had expected a lecture from his dad and Harry on the way back, but the two men had remained silent, both of them seemingly preoccupied with their own worries. Jacob was dying to see Bella. He wanted to do nothing more then to spend a day relaxing with her by his side. He had missed her terribly the last week. The hours he had spent with her in his wolf form had not been enough for him and now he wanted to make up for lost time. He was disappointed when he got home and found she wasn't there, and more so when he recognized who she was with. He could smell Embry's scent clearly, another bonus or curse, whichever way you looked at it, from his new alter ego.

Jacob retreated to his room, irrational jealousy and anger darkening his mood. Why would Bella have gone off with Embry? Surely she didn't like him, did she? They had seemed pretty cosy the day before and by the way his friend was acting his innocent crush seemed to be edging to something more profound. Jacob felt sick at the thought of it. He loved Bella, they were meant to be together. He had been in love with her since a young boy. He had told her openly enough, but he knew she was feeling unsure how to deal with it. She was practically his adopted sister, and they had grown up together in the same house. He guessed that she might feel uncomfortable about that fact. He had hoped that just by giving her time she would see past that. Perhaps he should make himself clearer. There was no way he was going to lose Bella to Embry Call of all people.

* * *

Bella giggled as Embry bit into his burger and a smear of tomato sauce shot out and onto his nose. It reminded her of the chocolate cake incident the day before. He looked at her in confusion. "What?" He said with his mouth full.

"You've got sauce on your nose." Bella picked up a napkin and wiped it away.

Embry chewed his burger and swallowed it down quickly. He flashed her his cute smile. "Thanks."

"My pleasure." Bella returned his smile and then dropped her eyes to her own food. She quickly picked up her fries and began eating them. "So, when did you learn how to make beautiful jewellery like this?" She touched the earrings, making them swing gently.

"Oh from Billy. He taught both me and Jake when we were really young before Sarah died." Embry told her.

Tears welled up in Bella's eyes at the mention of her adopted mother. She had been the only mother she had ever known. She sometimes wondered whether she was cursed, to lose not only Renee her birth mother, but Sarah too. Bella hung her head to try and hide her emotions. A gentle touch on her cheek made her raise her head again in shock. Embry was gazing at her lovingly as he trailed his fingers across her cheek. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have mentioned Sarah. I didn't think. You must miss her so much."

The tears began to leak out of Bella's eyes. "Don't be sorry." She whispered. "No one ever really talks about her at home. Jake gets too upset and Billy just shuts down. I would love to be able to remember the good times with her. Sarah was amazing, and for the short time I had with her, I rejoice every day. She shaped who I am today and I will never forget what she did for me."

"Oh Bella." Embry stood up and came to sit beside her. He put his arm across her shoulders and pulled her close. "You can talk to me about her whenever you want."

"Thanks Em." Bella lay her head on his shoulder and wept quietly for the woman she would never get to see again.

* * *

Jacob heard the door open and close gently. Bella had returned, he listened as she greeted Billy and then made her way down the hall to his room. She knocked on the door. "Jake?"

"Come in." He said hoarsely.

Bella edged into the room and gave him a tired smile. "How did the meeting go?"

Jacob lay on his bed, his hands behind his head as he watched her approach. "About what I expected."

"Oh...I don't suppose you can tell me what it was about?" Bella asked as she lay beside him, copying his pose as she put her hands behind her head.

"I'm sorry, Bells." Jacob shrugged. They were both silent for a moment before he spoke again. "So...where have you been?"

Bella's cheeks flushed red. "Oh, I just went to the diner with Embry that's all."

Jacob felt the familiar stab of jealousy hit him square in the heart. He did his best to keep his tone even. "Oh...did you have fun?"

"Yeah..it was fine." Bella said cautiously.

Jacob turned his head and finally noticed the earrings Embry had given her. His eyes darkened as he stared at them. "Where did you get those?"

Bella glanced at him sideways. "Em gave them to me."

"Why?" Jacob was losing his cool. He sat up and glared down at her.

"I don't know, maybe because I helped him with his homework. What's the big deal?" Bella sat up too, astonished by the look he was giving her.

"You don't give presents like that to someone just because you helped them with their homework. What the hell is going on between you two?" Jacob demanded, letting his emotions get the better of him.

Bella slid off the bed and matched his glare. "That is none of your business."

"Yes it is." Jacob retorted hotly. "He is after something. It's obvious."

"Go to hell, Jake." Bella yelled at him as her own temper flared. She began to back toward the door.

"Where are you going? We need to talk about this?" Jacob got up off his bed and tried to follow her.

"Leave me alone." Bella said brokenly. "Until you can control your temper I won't talk to you about anything." She fled the room, slamming the door after her.

Jacob stood staring at the closed door, his arms shaking as he tried to process how things had gone downhill so quickly. The urge to phase was overwhelming. He went to his window and opened it and climbed outside. The fresh air hit him in the face and he breathed deeply as he sprinted for the trees. He needed to burn off his anger.

Seconds later Bella came back into the room to try and talk things through. She was stunned to see it was empty, the window wide open, showing her that Jacob had broken his promise and run away for a second time.

_**A/N-thanks for reading!**_


	11. Chapter 11

**Loss **

Disclaimer: all characters and copyright belong to Stephanie Meyer.

_**A/N-thank you for the awesome reviews. WARNING: Get the tissues ready! :'(**_

**Part Ten-Harry**

Jacob phased back as soon as he reached the edge of the trees surrounding his house. He retrieved his shorts from the spot he had hidden them under a bush and slipped them on. The run had done him good, it had allowed him to burn off his anger and resentment. He knew he had overreacted. He shouldn't take his petty jealousy out on Bella. With this resolution in mind, Jacob ran back to the house and slipped through his opened window. He was shocked to find Bella asleep on his bed. As soon as his feet hit the floor, her eyes opened and she shot him a glare.

"Where the hell did you go?" She ranted. "I came back in here to talk things through and you just ran off again."

Jacob put his hands up in self defense. "I didn't just run off. I know I acted like a tool so I just took a walk to sort my head out."

Bella sank back on the bed and put her head in her hands. "I thought you had run off again." She confessed.

"Bells, I promised you I wouldn't go. I thought you trusted me." Jacob came and sat beside her, putting his arm over her shoulders.

She leaned against his warm side gratefully. "I do. I just worry, Jake. Something big is going on with you and I want to be able to help and support you."

Jacob rubbed the back of her hair with his hand. "You are supporting me just by being you. I'm sorry I can't say anything. Believe me I wish I could. Right now you have to just trust that when I go off I will be coming back."

Bella nodded, hiding her head in his shoulder. "I know." She mumbled.

"And what I said about Embry...I was out of order, Bells. I just got a little jealous." Jacob admitted.

Bella turned her head to peer up at him. She knew it had taken a lot for him to openly admit that. She smiled at him tentatively. "I shouldn't have lost my temper either."

Jacob grinned back at her as he ruffled her hair playfully. "So I'm forgiven?"

"You're forgiven you ass." Bella punched him lightly on the shoulder. She stood up and held out her hand. "Come on let me make you something to eat, you must be starving."

Jacob took her hand and rubbed his taut stomach with the other. "Always." He said with a smirk.

Bella rolled her eyes as she led the way out of his room.

* * *

Harry came back from the tribal meeting to be greeted by silence. The hairs on his back stood up as he ran to Seth's room only to find it empty. He began to panic as he scouted the whole house. No one was at home, not even his daughter Leah. The last place he checked was the kitchen and that was where he finally spotted the note penned in his wife's careful handwriting.

_Harry,_

_I have no idea what you were thinking keeping our son locked in his room while he was so ill. You have forced my hand here. I have taken him to the hospital, his temperature rapidly increased to 108 degrees and I refuse to wait anymore. If this action signals the end of our marriage then so be it. I cannot be tied to a man who puts some pathetic tribal rules above his own child's welfare. _

_Emily has helped me put Seth in her car and we are both heading to Forks. Join us or not, the choice is yours._

_Sue_

Harry sank onto one of the kitchen chairs, his hand shaking as he read the letter over and over. He couldn't believe it. He had made his wife and his sister, Emily, promise not to do anything rash while he was at the infernal meeting. Sue had been unusually compliant. How could he have been so stupid? She was just waiting for this window of opportunity to move their son while his back was turned. Sweat broke out on his brow as he fretted over what the hell the doctors at the hospital would make of his son's condition. If his temperature had increased to that degree then it was certain that poor Seth was in the final stages of his transformation.

There was nothing that could be done now, Harry knew he needed to get to the hospital as quickly as possible. He needed back up. Heading to the phone he called Billy and apprised of him the situation. His friend was alarmed. Billy promised to get Jacob to round up Sam and the others and send them on to the hospital.

"Are you okay Harry?" Billy asked in concern. "You sound breathless."

Harry rubbed his hand over his heart which was beating erratically. Sweat was pouring from his brow. "I'm fine." He managed to gasp. "Just get the others to the hospital as quick as you can."

"Be careful." Billy warned him before hanging up.

"It's too late for that." Harry mumbled to himself as he picked up the keys to his truck and stumbled back outside. The pain in his chest was worsening. He cursed the fried breakfast he had indulged in that morning. He hauled his bulk into the truck and turned on the engine, wiping the perspiration off his forehead as he pulled out of the drive.

* * *

Sue looked at the handsome blonde doctor. He was new at the hospital, in fact he had only started a couple of days before. He was already popular among the nurses. Gossip about him was rife among the staff; there were already bets on who would catch his interest first. He was a pleasant fellow, well mannered, orderly and punctual. He had a good bedside manner and spoke in a quiet and firm voice. He was not to Sue's personal taste, he was too pale for one thing. He had the whitest skin she had ever seen and as for his eyes; they were certainly a pretty color but amber was not something she had seen before. Maybe he was wearing colored contacts. All these thoughts floated through her head as she watched the doctor make himself comfortable in front of her.

"Hello Mrs, Clearwater. I'm Doctor Cullen. It is nice to finally meet you. The other staff here sing your praises highly." He said politely.

Sue gave him a small smile. "And you. I have been off because my son has been so ill. Please Doctor Cullen what is wrong? Do you have any idea?"

"Please call me Carlisle." He flashed her a smile, showing perfect teeth.

"Carlisle..." Sue echoed weakly.

His expression became serious as he leaned forward slightly and gave her a sympathetic smile. "We have put young Seth in the ICU for the moment until we can stabilize his condition. You brought him in just in time, his temperature, as you informed our staff on arrival, was off the chart. I have administered a mild sedative and some pain relief for him while we conduct more tests. He is stable for now. Please don't worry Mrs, Clearwater he is in good hands."

Sue felt a sob leave her throat, she could no longer keep in her tears. "Thank you. Can I sit with him?"

"Of course." Carlisle murmured solicitously. "I think you know where to go. I will be in again soon."

Sue nodded absently. She left him and began to head to the ICU, her nerves in shreds as she tried to keep her legs from collapsing from under her. If anything happened to her little Sethy because of her husbands refusal to bring him in earlier she would never forgive him.

* * *

Harry parked up the truck and switched off the engine. He rested his aching head on the steering wheel and tried to get his breathing under control. His heart was fluttering in his chest and the pain was increasing in severity. He knew this was more then just indigestion. Sue had been nagging him for months to get his eating under control. The doctors had warned him his cholesterol was high but he had blown off their concerns. His whole family had hearty appetites, in his mind there was nothing wrong with a square meal. He groaned as fresh pain washed over him. He needed to move.

Very slowly Harry climbed out of the truck and staggered over to the hospital entrance. The sweat beading his brow was dripping into his eyes and he was finding it difficult to see. He managed to reach the reception desk.

"Seff Clea...Clearwater..." Harry mumbled, he felt like his mouth wasn't moving properly. His words came out garbled.

The receptionist stared at him curiously. "Are you alright sir? Have you been drinking?"

"Seff...Seff..." Harry couldn't make himself understood, he fell against the reception desk, his vision going black.

The receptionist finally seemed to realise something was amiss. She called for assistance. "I need help here."

Harry dropped to the floor like a stone, his eyes rolling in his head and his body jerking uncontrollably. Everything slowed around him. He felt a cold pair of hands touch him; a voice smooth like velvet was whispering urgently in his ear. He tried to focus on that voice before he lost consciousness completely.

"I am Carlisle Cullen. I know you recognize that name. Your son is here and under my care. I promise you that I will make sure he is kept safe from prying eyes."

Harry forced his eyes open. For a brief few seconds his vision became clear and he stared directly into the amber eyes of Carlisle Cullen. He saw empathy and a deep well of sadness reflected in the other man's eyes.

"I'm so sorry." Carlisle said softly.

Harry knew what was coming. "Save my son." He choked out.

Carlisle nodded. Harry's eyes closed, his body giving one last vicious jerk as his heart stopped beating. Harry Clearwater was dead.

* * *

"Nooo this can't be true." Sue cried out in despair as she stared down at her husband's lifeless body. "Harry no."

Emily held onto Sue's shoulders as she wept. Tears were streaming down her own face as she looked at the dead body of her older brother. "Oh Harry." She whispered.

The doors to the private room burst open as Leah, followed by Sam, came into the room. Her hands flew to her mouth as she gazed at her father. "Daddy." She breathed.

Sam swiftly turned her around in his arms and held Leah tight to his chest. "I'm so sorry." He murmured over and over as Leah sobbed.

Outside the room Jacob, Paul and Jared milled around. Their faces were grim. None of them could believe how things had escalated. They had arrived at the hospital only to be told that Seth was in intensive care and that Harry had passed away mere moments before from a heart attack. Not only that, but they had been greeted by the last person they expected, a cold one. Not just any cold one either. Carlisle Cullen was a well known name among the Quileute tribe.

They had all been on the defensive immediately as soon as Carlisle had approached them. It was only because Sue and Emily were by his side that they had held back. The doctor had filled them in on what had happened, taking them all by surprise. It was Sam who kept order. He demanded they all keep calm as he listened to the cold one speak. He was the first of his type that any of them had encountered and it was hard for them to battle their natural instincts. But something about the empathy in his unusual eyes and the way he spoke, as if it pained him just as much as them, that Harry was gone, eased their fears.

"Jake." Bella cried out.

He began to run over to her. She was pushing Billy before her. His dad's face was awash with tears, his eyes dull and glassy. "Where is he?" He asked stiffly.

"Harry is in there with Sue, Leah, Emily and Sam." Jacob said huskily as he knelt down in front of his father.

"I need to see him." Billy wiped at his face angrily.

Jacob stood back up and began to push his chair toward the private room. "NO." Billy ordered. "I want to go in alone. Stay with Bella."

"Dad." Jacob protested mildly.

"Stay with Bella." Billy said again before rolling his chair forward and into the room.

Jacob watched his dad enter the room, the doors closing with a bang behind him. His whole body shuddered as Bella slipped her arms around his waist. "Oh my god, Jake. I can't believe it." She whispered brokenly.

"It's like mom all over again." Jacob said forlornly.

"I know." Bella clutched onto him tightly as she felt him wrap his strong arms completely around her.

"It's going to be alright." He tried to comfort her.

"Is it?" Bella sobbed.

Jacob didn't know what to say. Instead he pressed his lips into her hair and held onto her for dear life.

_**A/N-SOB!**_


	12. Chapter 12

**Loss**

Disclaimer: all characters and copyright belong to Stephanie Meyer.

_**A/N-thank you for the awesome reviews. Nikki :)**_

**Part Eleven-Edward**

Bella sat alone in the house staring sightlessly in front of her. Billy was with Sue at the hospital still. Jacob had been called away on some urgent tribal business he couldn't tell her about. Leah was at Seth's bedside with Sam, so with nothing else to do, Bella had come home. She felt in the way as she waited in the reception area by herself. The news of Harry's shocking death was finally sinking in, it brought back bad memories of her father's and Sarah's deaths. All three adults had been in their prime, too young to be taken away from their families. The only connection she could see between all of them was her. Since she had come to live on the reservation, death had followed her. Bella began to believe that she was a jinx to the people she loved and cared about. Tears began to leak out of her eyes as she mulled over what to do.

* * *

Sue stared at Billy and Carlisle in disbelief. She couldn't believe what she was hearing. She had just lost her husband, her son was critically ill and these two men had told her some unbelievable tale about werewolves and vampires. Sue had grown up with the legends; she knew the tales by heart, but she was a practical woman who believed in science. She was a nurse for god's sake. Unlike Harry, who had been one of the few elders of the tribe, she hadn't much time for what she considered the superstitions of a bunch of old men. Now Billy and Carlisle were expecting her to just accept that this was all true and that was the secret Harry was keeping from her.

"You are sick, both of you." She cried out, her fists clenched.

"Sue please. If Seth hadn't begun the process already we wouldn't have burdened you with this knowledge right after losing Harry, but I see no other choice." Billy replied, feeling sick to his stomach. "What I said is all true. My son, Sam, Paul and Jared are all spirit wolves. Carlisle here is a..." he stopped talking, unable to say anymore.

Carlisle took over the conversation. He was perched on the edge of his desk, a kindly expression on his handsome face as he looked at Sue Clearwater. "I do apologize and I understand your reluctance to accept what we tell you. However as Chief Black has already pointed out, Seth is in extreme danger. He is the youngest ever to phase as far as any of us are aware. Ephraim never advised that any young children changed within the last wolf pack, and I treated several of them back then when their lives were threatened by others of my kind."

Sue leaned back in her chair, feeling despair wash over her. "You are a cold one?"

"Yes. I understand we are mentioned in some of your legends. Decades ago we made a treaty with Ephraim promising never to venture onto his lands. I am not a human blood drinker Mrs, Clearwater. My family and I are different from the nomadic vampires that proliferated this area in the past. We like to class ourselves as vegetarians." Carlisle smiled wryly.

"What do you eat then?" Sue said faintly. Her head was pounding as she tried to understand this bizarre conversation she was engaging in.

"Animals." Carlisle replied in his gentle voice. "We learned to adapt and now only drink animal blood. That is the reason behind my unusual eye color. A human blood drinker's eyes would be red."

"And Seth?" Sue began to shake. "What about him? Is he going to die? Can you treat him?"

Carlisle exchanged a sad glance with Billy before answering her. "Unfortunately I cannot be around him Mrs, Clearwater. My close proximity only exacerbates his condition. We need to get him out of this hospital and back home. He will change that is certain now. You are a nurse and I will give you all the advice I can but that is all I can do. I do not want to make his transition more painful then it has to be. You will have the help of the other pack members as well of course."

Sue crumbled, drawing her knees up to her chest as she began to wail. Billy reached out for her but she shoved his hand away. "You men and your fucking secrets. I should have been told. I should have been told." She screamed out.

Billy's hand fell back in his lap as he felt guilt engulf him like a shroud. The urge to drink and blot out the pain was all consuming. "Excuse me for a moment." He mumbled as he wheeled his chair out of the room.

* * *

A knock on the door pulled Bella out of her sad thoughts. She got up from the couch and made her way to the door. It was Embry. As soon as he saw her tear streaked face he pulled her into a comforting hug. "I just heard. I am so sorry."

Bella hugged him back for a moment before pulling away. "Who told you?"

"Quil. Billy contacted his grandfather. I can't believe it. How are you holding up? I know it must bring back painful memories." Embry kept his hand on her lower back as he followed her into the house.

Bella just shrugged. "Kinda." She mumbled.

Embry gazed at her worriedly. He could see something was really wrong. He sat next to her on the couch and took her hand. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Bella raised her heard and looked at him dully. "Do you believe in bad omens, Em?"

He was surprised by this question. "Not really. Although living on the res with our legends you can't help being a bit superstitious."

Bella tore her eyes away from his and stared down at the floor. Her shoulders were hunched and he had to strain his ears to hear her words. "I'm a jinx Embry. It's my fault that Harry is gone."

Embry was astonished at this. "Don't be ridiculous, Bella. None of this has anything to do with you. How did you come to that crazy conclusion?" He said fiercely.

Bella wrenched her hand out of his and stood up. Her eyes were wild with grief as she began to pace back and forth. "Crazy? No it's not crazy at all. Look at what has happened since I was born. My mom dies giving birth to me. I lose my dad by the age of ten. I come to live with the Black's; two years later and Sarah has lost her life. Now Harry. This is all down to me and the curse I have hanging over my head. I am a monster and it all started when I killed my mom by being born."

"Stop it, Bella." Embry said desperately. He stood in front of her to stop her pacing. "You're being irrational. None of this is down to you. Get those thoughts out of your head. You are a lovely person, kind, beautiful and giving. You are not a monster and there is no curse."

Bella pushed him away again. "Get out before anything happens to you."

Embry put his hands on her shoulders, her whole body was trembling. "Bella stop it."

"I said get out." Bella yelled again, shoving him back.

"Where's Jake?" Embry demanded. "Maybe you'll listen to him."

"He'll just say the same as you." Bella hissed, fresh tears pouring out of her eyes. "I will not have anyone else hurt because of me."

"Don't Bella." Embry pleaded with her again.

"I said get out." She raged.

Embry stepped back, alarmed at how hysterical she was. It was obvious she wasn't going to listen to him. "I'm going to find Jake."

Bella didn't reply, she just ran to her room and slammed the door. Embry stood in the living room, uncertain whether to follow her. In the end he decided it was best to find Jake and get him to calm Bella down instead. With this thought in his head he called out to her that he would be back soon, he then left the house.

* * *

Leah couldn't understand why her mother was signing Seth out of the hospital. Sam had to hold her back as she yelled at Sue that she might as well be signing her little brother's death warrant. "What is wrong with you, mom? Have you let the old men infect your brain or something? You can't do this?"

Sue stoically ignored her as she handed the papers back to the discharge nurse and turned around. Emily stood in her path. "What are you doing, Sue? This is ridiculous."

"Get out of my way, Emily." Sue said coldly.

"What is wrong with you?" Emily was completely perplexed.

"I said get out of my way." Sue pushed past her sister in law and marched out of the hospital.

Leah turned her anger on Sam. "This is your doing, isn't it?" She hissed.

"This is for the best, you have to trust me." He pleaded with her.

Leah yanked her arms out of his hold. "Trust you? I don't think so. WE ARE OVER."

"Lee, don't be stupid." Sam grabbed her and spun her round.

"Let go of me or I'll scream." Leah said coldly.

Sam let her go and watched as she fled after her mother. He saw Emily give him a disgusted glance as she followed after her niece. He was in turmoil, he couldn't leave the hospital as he had to deal with Billy and speak to Carlisle. The burden of his new title began to drag him down. He just had to hope Leah would reconsider her threat when she calmed down.

* * *

Bella methodically packed her bag. She didn't take much, only essentials. She didn't want to be weighed down by unnecessary things. Her vision was blurred as the tears poured out of her eyes, she didn't want to leave the only home she had ever known, but she was determined that no one else was going to suffer because of her presence. Harry's premature death had been the tipping point for Bella. For years she had dampened down her grief at her own father's and Sarah's deaths, to support others. She hadn't really had the chance to grieve properly because of all the problems due to Billy's decline. It had all been about survival. Now it was different. There was too much at stake, namely Jake. If he was hurt because of some kind of curse that hung over her head she would never forgive herself. She had to leave now before she caused more trouble.

Her fears were irrational, but with the heavy burden of her grief, Bella wasn't thinking clearly. She slung the bag over her shoulder and left the house. She needed a ride. The only other transport, apart from Billy's truck, was Jacob's regeneration project, an old VW Rabbit that he was restoring. It was nearly done. Bella had seen him test driving it. She hoped that he wouldn't hate her for stealing it.

She opened the garage and pulled the tarpaulin off that covered the small red car. It's paint gleamed in the faint light. Bella unlocked the driver's door and shoved her bag onto the passenger seat, she then slid into the front seat, before closing the door. She gripped the steering wheel with both hands as she tried to get her wayward emotions under control. She could do this, she had to. Taking a deep breath she switched on the engine; exhaling in relief when it started first time. Slowly Bella put the little car in gear then drove it out of the garage. She paused for a second as she passed the little red house that had been her home since Charlie's death. More tears pooled out of her eyes as she put her foot down and drove away, not looking back once.

* * *

Bella knew there was trouble with the engine as soon as she reached Forks. The little car began to make an alarming whining sound. "Damn it." She cursed as she hit the steering wheel.

She forced the little car on, she didn't want to believe that it would actually break down. She managed to make it through Fork's small high street and out onto the main road leading out of Forks. The car sputtered down the winding road, jerking and shuddering as she tried to force it onwards, but to no avail. Two miles out of Forks the engine died completely. Bella steered the car to the side of the deserted road and put on the brakes. Her head dropped onto the steering wheel as she began to cry.

"I killed you too." She mumbled. "Everything I love dies."

She was so upset that she didn't hear the other car pull up silently behind her. It was only when the driver knocked lightly on her window that she jolted upright, staring at him wide eyed. It looked to be a young boy about her age, maybe a year older. She wound the window down reluctantly.

"Do you need help?" The boy asked, he flashed a crooked smile at her.

Bella studied him for a moment; his skin was as pale as hers, his hair was gelled into a messy style and the clothes he was wearing were obviously designer. This kid had money. It was his eyes that stood out though, they were an odd amber color. He leaned further in. "Are you okay?"

Bella shook herself, wiping at her eyes as she did so. "My car won't start." She mumbled.

"I'm afraid I'm not much of a mechanic." The boy said regretfully. "I can call a tow truck or give you a lift somewhere." He offered.

Bella gave him a weak smile as she got out of the car, reaching across to grab her bag. The boy's eyes zeroed in on it. "Are you going somewhere?"

"You could say that." Bella put the bag on her shoulder. "Maybe you could give me a lift to the nearest bus station?"

"Are you sure that's what you want?" The boy's eyes scrutinized her carefully. "I can see you've been crying."

"That's none of your business." Bella snapped.

The boy held up his hands. "Hey, I'm sorry. Look let's start again. My name is Edward Cullen. I've just moved here. And you?"

"Bella." She stared back at him, finally realizing who he was related to."Are you related to Carlisle Cullen? He's the doctor up at the hospital."

The boy flashed her his perfect smile again as he ran his hand through his messy hair. "Guilty as charged. He is my guardian."

"Oh." Bella bit her bottom lip, not knowing what else to say.

"Look Bella, why don't I take you onto Port Angeles and we can get something to eat? Sometimes things feel better on a full stomach." He waited expectantly for her answer.

"Maybe..." Bella shrugged, she didn't have anything better to do right now. "Okay, thank you."

Edward nodded as he spun round and led the way to his car, a shiny, obviously expensive silver Volvo. He opened the passenger door for her and waited as she climbed in, closing It carefully after her. Bella strapped herself in and made herself comfortable. Seconds later Edward got in the drivers seat and switched on the engine, it purred to life quietly. "Ready?" He asked.

Bella nodded. Edward put his foot down and tore off down the highway, leaving the VW Rabbit abandoned on the side of the road.

_**A/N-thanks for reading!**_


	13. Chapter 13

**Loss**

Disclaimer: all characters and copyright belong to Stephanie Meyer.

_**A/N-thank you for the awesome reviews. Nikki :)**_

**Part Twelve-Searching for Bella**

Jacob was in the house with his father when Paul and Jared came back from their scouting expedition. He had wanted to go with them in their search for Bella, but Sam had told him to stay put in case she returned unexpectedly. She hadn't. As soon as they came into the house, their faces looking grim, Jacob knew it was bad news.

"What?"

"We found your car, Jake. It was by the side of the road about a mile out of Forks." Jared began.

"And?" Jacob's fists clenched at his sides, his stomach churning as he watched Jared exchange a look with Paul.

"She wasn't there." Paul replied. "But we smelt vampire. I'm sorry. We tried to track them but the scent petered out by the side of the road. The cold one must have had transport."

Jacob heard his father gasp as he stared at his pack brothers in horror. "No, please tell me no."

"I'm sorry, Jake. It's certain." Jared said softly; his face awash with sympathy.

Jacob felt his heart break inside his chest. This couldn't be happening, it had to be some kind of surreal nightmare. He had come home from his meeting with the elders to find Embry frantically pacing up and down on his doorstep. His friend had told him all about his conversation with Bella. Embry had done his best to track him down but couldn't find him, so had come back to the house to check on Bella. She wasn't answering the door. Jacob had rushed inside, searching the whole house, only to find her gone. Embry had watched him in alarm as Jacob headed outside, using his supernatural sense of smell to track her. He followed her scent as far as the garage, that was when he had discovered his car was missing.

"Did you inform Sam?" Billy demanded.

"Yes." Paul said quickly. "He has gone to ask Carlisle for assistance. He thinks because the cold one was driving it can't be a nomad. We are supposed to rendezvous with them now."

Jacob was out the door within seconds. Billy sighed as he watched Paul and Jared follow after him swiftly. When he rolled his chair over to the window they were already out of sight.

* * *

Edward pulled a chair out for Bella and gestured for her to sit. She smiled politely at him as she sat down and made herself comfortable. He had taken her to a small little Italian bistro. She sat quietly while he ordered some food for her, but just a drink for himself.

"You're not eating?" Bella asked in confusion.

Edward smiled at her, a hint of amusement in his eyes, almost as if he was enjoying some private joke she was unaware of. "No, I ate earlier."

Bella frowned as she nervously fiddled with her knife and fork. "I don't have any money to pay..."

"It's my treat." Edward said dismissively. He placed his hands together in front of him while he watched her intently. "Now tell me what is really going on? Are you perhaps fleeing from some kind of trouble?"

"No." Bella whispered. "I just need a change of scenery."

"Mmm..."Edward murmured. He continued to scrutinize her intently, his eyes showing confusion. It was as if he was trying to read her in some way but failing. "This is so odd."

"Odd?" Bella put her hands in her lap to stop them shaking. "What's odd?"

"I don't mean odd exactly." Edward chuckled darkly. "Just unusual. I can't read you at all and I find that intriguing."

"Read me?" Bella was beginning to regret her hasty decision to accept this strange boy's dinner invitation. He was speaking in riddles. "Can you read minds or something?" She joked uncomfortably.

Edward smiled as if he found everything she said a riot. "Maybe."

"Forgive me." Bella replied, shifting awkwardly in her seat. "But you say the weirdest things."

"No need to be forgiven, Bella. I agree I can come across as hard to understand. Ask my sibling, Alice." He smiled at her again. "By the way what is the full version of your name, is it Isabella?"

"Yes." Bella said. "Isabella Swan, though I much prefer Bella."

"We'll stick with Bella then." Edward agreed.

The food arrived, interrupting their conversation. The waitress smiled at Edward, discreetly slipping a folded piece of paper over to him before slinking away. Bella glanced at the paper and noticed a cell number scrawled on the back. "It seems you have an admirer." She pointed out the number.

Edward glanced at it briefly before screwing up the paper. "I am not interested in her. I have more delightful company right here. Eat up Bella." He urged her.

Bella was feeling increasingly nervous. Why did he have to keep staring at her like that? She kept her eyes on her plate as she began to eat slowly, forcing herself to swallow the food. She choked on a piece of the ravioli he had ordered for her and reached for her glass of coke, chugging it down quickly.

"Are you okay?" Edward asked as he passed her his drink too.

Bella reached out for the glass and their fingers touched. His were like ice. She quickly sipped his drink too until she could breathe properly again. "Thanks. " She muttered.

"My pleasure." Edward flashed her his crooked smile again, his amber eyes still gazing at her with a puzzled frown.

Bella ate more slowly but made sure to keep her eyes on the food. She just wanted to finish up and get out of there.

* * *

Jacob checked his car over and over. He smelled every inch that he could. Bella's beloved scent washed over him, but it was intermingled with the disgusting scent of leech. He slammed the driver's door shut and began to curse. "Where the fuck did they go to?"

Jared put a calming hand on his shoulder. "You have to calm down, Jake."

"Where the hell is Sam and Carlisle?" Jacob couldn't calm down. He felt like all his worst fears were happening at once. Bella had to be okay, she just had to. If anything had happened to her his life wouldn't be worth living.

After waiting impatiently for another ten minutes, Sam emerged from the trees lining the edge of the road, behind him came Carlisle. He greeted them all politely.

"Just tell us what you think?" Jacob growled, not interested in exchanging pleasantries.

"Calm down, Jake." Sam warned him.

"It's okay." Carlisle interrupted smoothly. "I understand his fear. Now if you will all just give me a moment."

They all watched as Carlisle sniffed the air, just as they themselves had done. He then circled the car and examined inside. He then stood up, a puzzled frown furrowing his brow. "This cannot be." He mumbled.

"What? Have you sensed something?" Jacob demanded.

"Please just give me a moment. I need to make a call." Carlisle retreated a few meters from them and pulled out an expensive looking cell phone from his pocket.

"This is bullshit." Jacob spat. "I want answers." He began to march over in Carlisle's direction, but Sam ordered him to stop.

"Wait and see what he has to say."

"NO." Jacob snapped as he got right in Sam's face. "He knows who took her, it's obvious."

"Don't make me issue an Alpha order." Sam warned him, matching his confrontational stance.

"This is Bella's safety you are playing with." Jacob retorted.

"No, it is you who are making this harder. Just wait." Sam glared at him for a moment before Jacob's shoulders slumped in defeat. He sat down on the edge of the road, his head in his hands as he finally succumbed to his grief. He felt Sam put a hand on his shoulder in understanding as they all waited for Carlisle to finish his call.

* * *

Bella was just finishing up her meal when she heard a cell phone ringing. She glanced up at Edward as he let out a mournful sigh. "Excuse me." He said politely as he stood up from the table and pulled a phone out of his pocket.

He retreated to the front of the bistro as he took the call. Bella watched him anxiously as she saw his face darken. He looked extremely annoyed. She saw him glance at her a few times before he snapped the phone shut and walked swiftly back to her. "We have to leave, now." He whispered urgently.

"Why?" Bella asked in alarm.

Edward threw the money for the meal on the table, then reached across and took her arm. His cold fingers circled her wrist and his touch made her shiver. "I am not going anywhere. If you need to leave, then go. I am fine here. Thank you for your assistance."

"No, you have to come with me, Bella." Edward pulled on her arm. Bella tried to yank her arm away from him but his grip was like a vice.

"Let go. I am going nowhere with you." Her voice was raised as she began to panic. The other diners looked at them curiously.

"Bella please. It's important you come with me." Edward pleaded with her.

"No." Bella protested again.

Their altercation attracted the attention of the manager. He wound his way over to them. "Is there a problem here?"

Edward gave the manager a polite smile. "None at all. My girlfriend and I just had a little spat. Everything is fine now, isn't it love?"

Bella stared at Edward in disbelief. He was a good liar. She opened her mouth to dispute what he was saying, but found she couldn't speak. His eyes were boring into hers and she felt like her mind was going fuzzy.

"Miss?" The manager asked when she didn't answer.

Without her permission, Bella found herself smiling and nodding. "I'm fine, everything is fine." She choked out.

"Good, well I will wish you both a pleasant evening then." The manager seemed relieved that he didn't have to deal with anything further. Bella watched him go in consternation. Her last chance of escape was gone. Against her will she allowed Edward to lead her out of the bistro and back to his car. He opened the door for her and she got inside. It was as if she didn't have control over her limbs.

"You should put your seat belt on, Bella." Edward said easily as he slipped into the driver's seat.

Bella did as he suggested wordlessly. He smiled at her as he put his foot down, making the wheels spin as he sped away into the night, well over the speed limit.

* * *

It was only when they were a mile out of Port Angeles that Bella felt she had control back over her mind and body. She exhaled in relief as she tested out her hand, clenching and unclenching her fist. "What did you do to me?"

Edward sighed as he sped up a little. "I don't know what you mean."

"Yes you do." Bella snapped. "You controlled me."

"Do you know how insane that sounds?" Edward said dismissively.

"Where are you taking me?" Bella knew she wasn't going to get him to admit what he had done.

"I'm taking you home. You never told me you live in La Push with the chief of the tribe to."Edward seemed annoyed at this fact.

"Why would I have mentioned that fact? I don't know you." Bella questioned him. "Who was that call from?"

"My father Carlisle. You're family are absolutely frantic about you." Edward gave her a sideways glance, his eyes narrowing as if something had suddenly occurred to him. "Why were you running away? Have they been hurting you in some way?"

Bella shook her head vehemently. "No."

"Are you sure? Because if they have I can help you." Edward looked her full in the face.

"I told you no." Bella snapped again.

"Then why are you running?" Edward demanded.

"That is none of your business." Bella raged.

"You made it my business when you got into my car." Edward replied. "That was a stupid thing to do by the way. I could have been anybody."

Bella knew what he said was right. She had been an idiot. She turned her face away from him and looked out the window as he drove well over the speed limit all the way back to Forks. She did not speak to him again.

* * *

As soon as Edward pulled up by the side of the road where the VW Rabbit had been abandoned, Jacob wrenched the door of the Volvo open and pulled Bella into a tight bear hug. "Don't you ever pull that kind of stunt again, Bells? You scared the crap out of me."

Guilt and shame washed over Bella as she heard the agony in his voice. She hugged him back, glad to be in the safety of his arms. "I'm sorry... I just...I don't know..."

Jacob pressed his lips into her hair as he cuddled her closer. "I understand. Em told me. You know that it's not true, honey. That's your grief talking."

Bella began to cry, finally releasing her pent up tears. "I know...I just can't bear to lose anyone else. It's too much, Jake. It's just too much."

"I know." Jacob whispered. "I know."

While they were wrapped up in each other Sam approached Carlisle and Edward who were having some sort of silent communication. It seemed that the older man had reprimanded his so called son. Edward was glaring over at Jacob and Bella angrily.

"Why did he not bring her straight home?" Sam demanded as he neared Carlisle.

Carlisle smiled at Sam, trying to smooth things over. "Bella was upset when he found her and she refused to tell him where she lived. Edward simply took her for a meal to try and figure out where she came from. He apologizes for any worry this caused."

"Can he not speak for himself?" Sam crossed his arms and glared at Edward. There was something about this cold one he didn't trust. However he had brought Bella straight back unharmed when Carlisle had called him.

"I can speak for myself." Edward said stiffly. "What I want to know is why Bella was running in the first place?"

"That is none of your concern." Sam growled.

"Edward." Carlisle cautioned him. "Come now we must leave."

Edward glanced over at Jacob and Bella again, an inscrutable look in his strange eyes, as he finally followed Carlisle and got back in his car. Sam watched them go; somehow he sensed that this Edward Cullen could bring trouble.

_**A/N-thanks for reading!**_


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